The Immortal Journal

It would seem to some a peculiar memento for an immortal to keep a journal.

I have discovered that in my times of darkness the only thing that keeps me sane is daily writing. Imagine. A vampire walks into a psychologists office, lays back on the couch. The psychologist is blonde and buxom, pen and pad in hand ready to "fix or assist". "What brings you here, sir" she would say. The immortal glances over notices no ring on her finger, feeling his fangs extending brushing his bottom lip. The immortal letting out a sigh glances over at the beautiful doctor his mind reeling with what to say. The frustration in knowing that this beautiful being, who probably tastes like pure honey, is highly unqualified to deal with my issues.... Well at least in the therapy department.

I think of the only thing she may be able to help me with. Loneliness. Anxiety. Dread.

She promptly diagnoses me. Anxiety/Agoraphobia. The fact that my family is "disjointed" she tells me. Most likely since they were all born in the 1900's and dead although I don't tell the doctor this. I make up the common family issues.

hmmmm She has bright red nails, I hadn't noticed that before I think to myself.

The fact that I don't like crowds and tight places. I so badly wanted to tell her of me being chased through a crowd of vampires and then being bound in a coffin with chains and buried to rot by the townsfolk after I drank one of the farmers cows. I sigh...... My brother locked me in the closet, and my mother abandoned me in a large crowd. The only normal abnormal thing I could come up with to tell her.

I'm really just looking for tools to help me deal with these feelings.

A smile and caring eyes are staring at me. She is so understanding, my mind wanders.

"Well Victor, you are going to get better and I can definitely assist you with finding your way but know that you will be doing all the work. I will just guide you. "

I nod.

Shes an angel. I actually feel better.

She hands me a journal.

"Any thoughts whether bad or good, any fear, hopes and dreams can go in this journal, this is just for your eyes"

It's a beautiful black leather bound book with a inscription on it " The Universe is hidden within you"

It appears expensive and is hand punched woven with leather strands. The therapy alone is expensive. Top shelf. Why should I expect anything less.

" I will never ask to look at your journal, unless you permit me to do so Victor" she says brushing her hand over the top of it as if blessing it.

Relief.

Cause angel...........I am guilty.

I leave her office.

She mumbles something to me about getting out in the sun, I look pale and the vitamin D would do me good. I nod.

I journal every day since then.

DAY 1 OF ETERNITY

Oh look at that I woke up.

Shocking.

It used to be funny when i first told myself that ya know. Like back in the 1920's.

Now it's humor is lost on me.

What to do today. I could challenge myself with an elevator ride instead of using the stairs. Nothing like being stuck in a moving box on a tiny cable with humans.