Koa-
It's officially the last day of the trip and everyone is parting ways to began there new lives. Except us of course, we all are working at the same place for design (Soo, Star and Me). As for the guys only James, Leo and Dante are at the engineering office next to us. And Lucas well...he's down the street from us, he owns his own engineering company already.(the one that was passed down remember). "So we all should totally meet up tomorrow" Soo said hugging me and Dante. "Babe it's not school anymore, we actually have to be on time to work especially being the first day" we all agreed causing Soo to frown. "How about we meet up the evening after work, say around eight?" Leo asked. Everyone soon agreed and shortly started parting ways. "Okay bye bye see you guys later" Soo yelled pulling Star and Dante away followed with Leo. Leaving Lucas, James and I, "come I'll drive you home" James said grabbing my hand and bag. I smiled and nodded following him. "Koa" we both stopped and turned to see Lucas with pleading eyes. "I just need a minute" he said moving a little closer.
'I wanted to I really did....but that's the problem, I want to. I have to let him go, out of respect for James I need to stay far away from Lucas.'
"I'm sor-
"It's fine I'll start the car" James said before giving me a nodded and reassuring smile. He gave a glance at Lucas, giving a quick nod. I then turned to Lucas and sighed. "Lucas we can't do this"
"Do what?"
"This whatever this is we can't do it" I stated again.
"But aren't we just talking ko?" I rolled my eyes and folded my arms. "With us it's never just talking...talking end up with arguments and arguments end up with apologizing which end up with sex...and I don't think that is best for me anymore" he nodded.
"And he is?" I nodded, "yes, he makes me happy not to mention that we're actually in a relationship" I explained irritatedly. He again nodded and sighed, causing me to get even more aggravated. "SAY SOMETHING!"
"SAY WHAT KOA, YOU WANTED THIS! YOU GAVE UP ON ME NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND! NOW YOU EXCEPT ME TO FIGHT FOR YOU?" He yelled making tears fall from my eyes.
"YES FIGHT FOR ME, SHOW ME YOU AT LEAST CARED! I CARED FOR SO LONG AND ALWAYS ENDED UP HURT NEVER THE OTHER WAY AROUND! NOW THAT IM FINALLY HAPPY YOU SEEM TO WANT ME! WELL NO I DONT WANT THIS ANYMORE!.....what we had is over and completely dead to me" I finished while wiping my tears away.
I turned walking away, "IM FUCKED UP AND WE BOTH KNOW THAT! THE WAY I SEE THINGS AND THE WAY YOU SEE THINGS ARE DIFFERENT! BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T FEEL ANY DIFFERENT FROM YOU! I LOVE YOU WITH EVERY INCH OF FIBER IN MY BODY! WHEN I THINK ABOUT-ABOUT HOW MUCH I HURT YOU, IT KILLS ME INSIDE! I FAUGHT FOR US-FOR YOU! BUT IN THE END, ITS ALL ENDS THE SAME...." he said now fulling crying in agony letting out a sigh. "I'll stop pursuing you okay? But at least listen to the message." With that begin said he turned and started to walk away. I sighed and turned around as well walking slowly. As I was walking I took out my phone and went to unread messages and voicemails.
I took a deep dreary before pressing play.
'Koa hey it's Lucas but you probably know that already. Look I just wanted to say sorry about how things turned out today. I should've been straight forward with you but-things isn't that easy for me. My mom died when I was ten my dad then remarried and here I am now with that bitter woman. Soon enough he followed and passed away.
Leaving me with her along with his company. Once she found out she knew that I had to run it one way or another . She took it among herself to raise me the way she saw fit. Koa..everything I did everything I said and continuously do is only what I'm taught. But I'm well aware of right and wrong but not how to express myself nor take in others.
What I'm trying to say is I apologize for everything I did and might continue to do. But I love you Koa. I love everything about you and I'll love you until my last breath but I'm swear that life is to short so if I never see you again I hope that your happy....that's all I guess bye Koa from your first toxic lover
Luca'
As soon as the message ended I dropped down to the ground feeling as if I lost every single ounce of strength in me. I rapidly started breathing trying to catch my breath. "Koa" James said softly walking to me. I looked at Jim's me shook my head letting tears fall. He gave me a comfort smile and bent down yanking me into a big hug. Letting me cry in his chest.
'People change, just as much as possibility rates change. But that doesn't mean you modify your life around the possibilities. It just means live your life with them in it. Take a road trip and run out of gas, go get married and find out that they're billionaire. Fall for a guy who you know you have no possible chance with and do it again and again, because the reality is.....you can'
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YOU ARE READING
I Hope Forever.
RomanceDoes this make him feel happy? Do I give him satisfaction? When he kissed me I felt something. I felt wanted, needed even loved. He must like me right? I mean he smiled at me. He helps me, even walks me home not to mention we kiss like it normal. Bu...
