The courting trap

I Will

A.N.

https://youtu.be/cPprGc5QI58si=i77FrUUOuiIrbjiA

(Orchestral suite no. 2 in B minor, BWV 1067: V. Double) This is the link to the song that's played when you see the *, hope you enjoy!

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The doors open slowly and on que the benches squeak as  hundreds of people stand up and turn to look at me.

All eyes are on me except Nicholas's green ones. He is still standing sideways, rather than facing me. Everyone watches me closely and I feel uneasy under their gaze. I am too stunned to move, I only do so when father starts walking and practically pulls me along. The weight of the dress drags behind me. Adoring smiles are everywhere around me, but it doesn't make me feel appreciated, it feels like they're laughing at me. Happy that my future will be miserable from this day forward.

The high ceilings of the cathedral make it all more frightening, making me feel even more small and vulnerable. I can't even recollect the carriage ride, I blinked and I was here. My heels thud on the carpet that's rolled out to lead to the altar. The priest is already standing in his place.

There are butterflies in my stomach from the nerves, maybe butterflies is not the best way to describe it. More like bees, stinging me on my insides, trying to get out.

Only twenty more steps and my life will be ruined.
Fifteen more steps and I will never be free again.
Ten steps and I reach the person I despise most in this world.
Five more steps and I have to say 'I will' to spending the rest of my life with him.
One last step and I am forever trapped with him.

Father lets go of my hand and leads my to stand next to Nicholas. "Good afternoon your royal highness." The priest says with a kind smile on his face. He seems excited to get the opportunity to marry the future king and queen.

"Good afternoon father." I murmur as I nod my head to him in a bow. I turn to face Nicholas now, he slowly inspects my dress with an expressionless look on his face. His eyes meet mine at last and he looks at me coldly, not saying a word.

"Nicholas." I address him as I do a curtsy.

"Victoria." He bows, annoyances clearly evident in his tone.

All the people sit down at once and the benches creak underneath their seat. "In the name of the father, and of the son, and of the holy spirit, grace to you and peace from God our father and the Lord Jesus Christ." The priest says a prayer and I among everyone else reply with an "Amen."

I'm not the most devoted Christian there is, but this time I could really use the prayers.

I try to focus on the cold dagger strapped against my thigh, instead of the  situation. I fear that it would all become too much, if I didn't try to block it all out.

"Dear beloved, we are gathered together today in the sight of God to join together this man and woman."

The priest talks a lot, but I only hear some of the things he says. I am too fixated on Nicholas. This whole time we are holding eye contact. It's very intense, the look in his eyes can tell me a thousand words.

He knows we will make each other's life insufferable, and I think he can't wait to do so.

His lips suddenly curl into the words "I am." He stare at me, awaiting. I turn to look at the priest, he too stares at me in anticipation. "I am." I reply swiftly, I have no idea what I just admitted to doing.