"Ethan's epiphany" (Ethan's Wacker's Gay Fanfiction)

Part 1: I can't stop thinking about it

Note: This is a side book to my main one "New to this" (Carson Lueders x Connor Finnerty gay fanfiction)

[Ethan's POV]
"Oh, oh, please, Carson, ahhhh..." I moaned as I masturbated to a shirtless picture of Connor's boyfriend.
It was a week now I was back in Honolulu and I couldn't stop thinking about what happened in LA.
I just wanted to fuck Carson so bad. I missed his plump ass and his juicy muscular body.

I stroked my hard dick few more times and then I released my cum on the bathroom floor.

Here I was, sitting on the toilet, panting, my hands full of my own semen and a burning desire to have sex with that handsome boy again.
A week had gone and I still couldn't forget his sweet ass, his lips, his blonde hair. Oh God, I longed him so bad and it kinda made me upset the fact the Connor could have him, while I was here alone.

I cleaned the mess I had made. I was getting used to it. Before that meeting in LA, I had never had sex before. I used to watch porn, masturbate, but what I had experienced there was... Oh, man, I don't even know how to describe it. Actually, I am a bit addicted to masturbation and it was me who asked Connor to observe him and Carson having fun. Now I can say it was worth it.

It made me question my sexuality, though. I had always defined myself as straight, but then something changed. I don't know but seeing their sexy bodies cuddling made me so horny.
I think I am still not sure about my sexuality. Why do we need to be classified as hetero, gay, bi or else? Actually I think my sexuality is more a matter of pleasure. Sometimes I take pleasure in watching two girls kissing, other times I desire a girl so bad, and now... Well, now I would have amused myself by penetrating a man.
But the man I wanted was already taken.
I would have given the world to fuck with Carson again.
Connor was attractive as well, but too feminine for me. I wanted some rough sex with a sexy muscular boy.

I went to my bedroom and lay in my bed. I couldn't stop thinking about it. My memories kept on coming back in my dreams. I suddenly realized that I needed a distraction. I couldn't go on like that forever. Maybe having another person by my side would have helped me! But what person? A man, a girl?
I was more interested in exploring the universe of gay porn. I didn't know much about it, but what I had experienced at Connor's changed me forever.
But who would have had sex with me?
My longtime friends? Nah, I would have scared the crap out of them if I had told them about my desires. I needed to find someone else, someone new. But how?
I did research online. Apparently there are a lot of meeting apps for gay people.

I wasn't sure about them. Should I have downloaded them? What if my parents found out? I didn't care too much about what they could be thinking. I was looking for a sexual relief. I needed something to forget Carson, and that was the key.
Eventually I downloaded Grindr. I created an account and uploaded some photos of my torso. I didn't want to show my face. I don't consider myself so beautiful. I hate my face, hate my hair, hate the white pallor of my skin. And those freckle. I wasn't that good looking. The only thing I loved about myself was my muscular chest. I had worked out so much in the latest months. And Connor and Carson seemed to appreciate that. So, I thought that uploading a picture of my abs was the best.

[Ethan downloads the app and creates an account]

I had done it; there was no going back, now. I put the phone on my bedside table and waited. I lit a cig and began to puff, trying to calm down. I was too curious to know who would have written to me. If it was an old man, I would have declined his offer. I was ready to accept men around my age, maybe a bit older, but not over 30.
As I was getting lost in my thoughts, I got a notification on my phone. It was someone from Grindr.
I excitedly opened it and found a message from B02. Who picks such a bad name?
However he had sent me an "Hi". Our conversation went on like this:
"What's up?" I asked.

"I am fine, thanks"

"Cool. Hey, I have looked to your profile picture. You are really hot!"

"He he thanks. You have beautiful abs as well. I have read you are looking for guys in Honolulu, right?"

"Right, are you from Honolulu?"

"Actually not, but I am here on vacation. I was getting kinda horny so I thought that..."

"Yeah, me too. How old are you?"

"Eighteen"

"Ohh, that's perfect. I am eighteen, too. Would you like to sex chat or could we also meet in person?"

"I would love to meet you. You could come to my Air BnB"

"Sounds cool. Text me the address".

He sent me the address and I got ready. I left home, without my parents noticing it and ran to his house, which was actually pretty close to my mansion. I wasn't sure what to expect. He seemed cute, he had a good body, well defined, skinny and quite muscular. I was bigger than him, but his body reminded me of Carson. It was obvious that he didn't want to start any relationship. He just wanted casual sex and I was okay with that.

I arrived at his house. It was a small flat in a modern building. I took the elevator to the floor he had indicated me in the text and knocked to the door n.30. Nobody came. I thought someone was pranking me. It was irritating. I waited few more seconds, until I heard a click. Someone was opening the door just before I was about to go away.

"Ethan1.8?" An awesome boy asked me.

"Yeah!" I exclaimed. "You must be B02!"

"Yeah, come in!"

His apartment was huge and had a marvelous view on the ocean. For a minute I was raptured by that wonderful sight. The scent of the sea filled the room and it mixed with the typical smell coming from a teenager's room.

"Sorry, it's a bit messy in here!" He told me. I made a sign, letting him know that I didn't care about the mess.

"Can I ask you what's your name?" I questioned him.

"Promise me you won't tell it anybody..."

"Promise"

"I am Ben Azelart. You are Ethan...?"

"Wacker"

"Alright. Is it your first time doing this?"
Ben asked me, noticing my uneasiness.

"Kinda" I replied looking at him. It was the first time I was staring at him properly. I had avoided his eyes so far. I was ashamed, maybe too shy. But when our eyes met, I felt more comfortable. He was a boy like me and we were both seeking for the same adventure. What could possibly go wrong?

"Don't worry. I will be gentle" He said..

"I mean, it's the first time meeting a stranger on Grindr. I have already had some experiences."

"Ex boyfriend?" He asked me.

"No, a threesome" I replied.

"Oh, I see. Was it a gay thing or...? Wait, are you gay, right?"

"It was with two guys and I don't know if I am gay or what, but right now I am starving to have sex with a man!"

"Good, because I am technically straight, but sometimes I like pounding men. The way they suck my balls and worship my anus is something a girl could never do!"

I approached him and put my hand on his crotch, while kissing him and biting his lips.

"I see you are horny, Ethan!"

"Aren't you, too?"

"As hell. I can't wait to see those abs!"