I Wanna Get Love ➤ Zhengkun ✔

chapter eleven

Zhengting isn't sure how much time he spends sitting on a park bench, letting his thoughts take over him, but he knows it's late enough that he starts seeing the sun rise. Between lapses of sleep, then being awake, Zhengting can't seem to get him out of his mind.

Lots of denial.

Zhengting is going crazy, isn't he? How can he possibly like Xukun that way? He used to hate Xukun, swore to hate him for the rest of his life. This wasn't supposed to happen. Xukun wasn't supposed to start being nice to Zhengting, he wasn't supposed to make friends with Zhengting's friends, he wasn't supposed to care about Zhengting. Zhengting wasn't supposed to care back.

Not only is Zhengting sleep deprived now, but he's pretty sure he needs to check his brain for unusual activity. Could the roses be scented with something weird?

Zhengting rolls his eyes at himself, shaking his head at the absurdity. He knows he's being ridiculous, because really, who is this hung up about the fact that they like someone? At the same time, Zhengting never signed up for this. He didn't expect his heart to betray him like this.

Everything about this feeling is completely foreign to Zhengting. For one, Zhengting has always had the tendency to have crushes on guys that were unattainable to him. Guys that many people generally tend to like, like that perfect boy next door type. While Xukun surely fits that perfect guy criteria, something in Zhengting makes him feel like Xukun is different. Somehow a little more attainable than the rest.

No, don't be stupid, Zhengting. While Zhengting has developed these feelings, it doesn't mean that Xukun has as well. Xukun is equally as unattainable as all the other guys Zhengting has liked in his past, it only makes sense that Zhengting got these feelings in the first place.

A part of Zhengting laughs. Is he really making Xukun out to be some perfect guy? Zhengting knows for a fact that he saw Xukun pick his nose once. Xukun regards his basketball as if it were his actual baby, but will still play with it loudly every once in a while. Xukun plays his music too loudly. Xukun is messy.

Zhengting starts laughing, thinking about all of Xukun's imperfections. That, Zhengting thinks, is what makes Xukun so real and different from the other guys. Zhengting has gotten to know Xukun, the good and the bad, and that is something Zhengting hasn't been able to get out of other guys. Zhengting never got to know his crushes past the perfect guy exterior.

Zhengting closes his eyes again, seeing if maybe he can have one last nap before heading back to his dorm. He's glad it's still the weekend, and that Zhengting doesn't have anything too important schedule for the following day. Truthfully, Zhengting was expecting to get drunk with his other dance mates, therefore he was expecting to wake up to a hangover. Thankfully for that, Zhengting doesn't have anything too hard to do for the rest of the day, but he still feels a headache, despite not haven gotten drunk.

Zhengting has always been the type of person that can't sleep with lights on, which makes it all the more hard to fall asleep at the moment. The sun has risen, the sunlight peeking through Zhengting's eyelids, making him scrunch his eyes in annoyance. Perhaps this is a sign to go back to his dorm already, but he can't bare it. His heart still feels too heavy.

Zhengting breathes in the air, noting how there's hints of smoke lingering in the scent. As sad as it is, that smokey aroma makes up the outside smell that Zhengting has always known. Zhengting doesn't like the smell of smoke, nor does he like the concept of smoking. He can't bare the smell of smoke, yet he continues to breath in and out, letting himself get used to it.

Zhengting hears small footsteps around him, but he doesn't pay much attention to them. It's nice and early, he would expect people to be around. Well, crazy parents who take their kids to the park this early, at least. Maybe it is the police telling him to leave.