Before the Fall

Chapter Thirty-Six - Sana

Aster

I felt awkward standing in Namjoon's office. Looking around told me a great deal about the man himself.

Numerous awards of merit and certificates lined one wall, while maps of Korea and the world covered a portion of another. The only personal photo was of him and the other seven men, apparently while Moon was still around.

I walked up to the humbly framed photo hanging on the wall next to the door. I stood in front of it and studied their faces.

Their feline ears were all up and their smiles were wide. The one face I didn't know must have been Moon. He was in the middle, right behind Jungkook. He was in between Yoongi and Taehyung and looked so happy.

They all looked happy. Young and carefree. Not an idea anywhere between them that their lives would drastically change.

"I miss those days," said Namjoon, now seated at his desk.

I turned and saw him looking past me to the picture on the wall. "You all looked so happy."

I watched his shoulders go up and down with the sigh he released. "Despite everything, we were. As long as we were together."

I sat down in a chair next to his desk and watched his fingers spin a pen around. His bottom jaw was forward a bit and his brow was furrowed together. He finally slapped the pen down on the desk and looked right into my eyes. It was a bit unnerving.

"Let's go take a walk."

"Now?"

"Yeah. I want to see how the camps are doing."

"You're going to show them to me?"

"You know about them. Why not?"

He stood and walked towards the door, motioning for me to follow him. I caught myself staring at his sleek black tail once more and I must have stopped walking because I heard him clear his throat and then my cheeks flamed with embarrassment.

"Sorry," I muttered as I brushed past him and out the door, "still getting used to this."

I heard him chuckle a bit and it sent warmth through my chest. I could sense he was a good man, just dealt a hand of terrible cards. I found myself wanting to help him and wanting more than ever to see Li eat dirt.

* * *

Namjoon

I kept reminding myself that Aster was a fresh widow and I had no right even thinking about her in any way other than a comrade in our cause. I didn't want to put undue pressure on her with whatever it was I was beginning to feel.

Her white tail wrapped around her torso as we walked, her ears twitching with each new sound. The fatigues she was wearing were too big and quite baggy, and as I walked behind her down the hall, I found myself imagining what shape she had under that loose silhouette of clothes.

I found myself entirely too close to her as we walked and I slowed my steps a bit so I could be a few paces behind her. We reached the end of the hall and it was a dead end.

"Left or right?" she asked over her shoulder.

I licked my lips with a tongue that felt like sand and walked past her, heading to the left. "Ah...the exit is this way," I said, my voice cracking.

I heard a little giggle behind me and my pride took a major hit. My voice cracking? At my age? How embarrassing.

"Namjoon! Don't walk so fast! Please!" She called out to me and I realized I was quite far ahead of her at this point. I slowed down to a stop and waited for her to catch up.