He cheated

chapter 3

Was i that bad?
Was i a bad lover?
Is she this good?
Are you happy with her?
Is she now the reason of your smile?
Am i the sour fruit you hate to have?

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I saw you with her again, when i went to walmart. When i was putting groceries in car i saw you holding shopping bags for her.

You never did that for me. May be once when we were on our honeymoon.

Why my chest ache when it should be my stomach???

Letter 2

Hey lover,

Its me again. You know i wanted to hate you so much but i couldn't. This craving to have you near or for myself is killing me. You know when i saw you again kissing her what did i do?

I picked the same razor i use to cut myself with. Use to.

After seeing you with her. Washing her marks on your shirt and smelling the perfume is like razor, as its working automatically.

So hey lover i cut my self a little not too deep. You know when you didn't come for a week, i sleep in my baby's nursery again.

You know i am always up in the middle of the night searching for my baby. I will search the house all over to find my baby and when i couldn't , i will cry the whole night till i cry myself asleep.

So hey lover, do you know i love you? Do you know the laugh you share with her is the same time i mourne for our marriage and my baby.

Hey lover, did you notice that I am getting weak. The day you ask me where was i. I didn't reply and went to bed because i went to see the doctor and i wanted to laugh so loud till the neighbors complain.

you want to know why?

He said i have depression. Me? Can you imagine?

I never did told you but your dad never liked me.

I guess, being the house wife and not being socially active is not acceptable for him. Your mother is a different story, she is the second mother to me. I love her like i would love my own mother. Do you know she comes once a week to see me and to know my whereabouts. She knows i am getting weak. She tried to cheer me up but i guess her son is doing a job very nicely.

The job to love someone else.
I never told her that you have someone else in your life and you are with her all the time.

You complained that i switch off the lights when we fuck. I can't say love anymore.

Do you know, i cry after we fuck. I can't let you see the marks i have all over my body. Do you know i scrub to get her marks off my body, i feel something's crawling over me when we fuck. I see the way you make love to her in your eyes. I feel the betrayal like I'm the other woman in your life, when you said her name once in our fucking that just did it.

I felt like i am using you so i scrubbed myself clean so won't feel her essence on my body.

But it's ok i am happy for you. I don't regret anything. I hope you are happy with her. I will live the last days i have with you.

i miss you my baby mommy is coming for you

With lost of love

Your ex-wife
Allina

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Updates are slow but i will try to post fast. It's just that people, i dont get any feedbacks.

I feel like i am writing and no one is reading. So if you appreciate than do write something and vote.

Xoxo
Black