PAINTED LOVE

NINE

sebastian hayes

.  .  .  .  .  .

There's some things I like to keep a secret from everyone. Things no one actually knows, not even Dean or Elias. 

Those things can be silly, like the fact that I enjoy playing the piano and I'm actually pretty decent at it. Perhaps because I've taken classes from 4 to 16 years old. 

Another example of something no one is supposed to know, is that my father has become a drunk bastard after my mom's death. He beats me and my little sister. He gets aggressive. He'll probably die from liver failure in a few years if he keeps sailing on this track. And I'm not even sure if I'll mind.

And this secret, the truth about my dad, is supposed to stay hidden from everyone. Which means I'll have to find an excuse for Loïse. 

I know she's had a Communication sciences class. And it happens that I know where, too. Her class has already finished about 10 minutes, before I arrive there. 

When I enter the hallway, a lot of the students have already left. Loïse is still standing there, she is turned to the other side, so I can see her brown curls bounce everytime she laughs. She's standing in front of someone I can't see, so I figure it must be Luna or her other friend, who's also studying medicine (Christina? Christine? Chrissy?)

When I walk up to her though, I see a pair of broad shoulders sticking out and a face that I know all too well. Jackson Barnes. 

He lives in the house next to mine, together with Cameron James and some other frat boys. He's an annoying ass, unlike the rest of his roommates. 

I clear my throat when I stop right behind Loïse. She immediately turns around when she hears the noise and her lips part when she sees me. Jackson's ugly, annoying face looks at me, too and I feel my fist itching to break his nose right now. He's never done anything wrong to me, besides being a total dick and talking to Loïse, like he doesn't know she's my 'girlfriend'. I can't hide the stinging, clenching feeling that rises up when I recall Loïse laughing about what he was saying to her, though. Why the fuck was he trying to make her laugh?! Like that's his fucking job to do?! Didn't think so, it's mine so that annoying fuck should back the hell up. 

"Sebastian. Hi", she greets politely. 

"Hey princess", I tell her. I nod at Jackson. He doesn't even nod back, ass. 
"Do you mind coming with me for a moment? I've got something important to tell you."

She frowns but follows along either way. When we're 20 metres seperated from Jackson, I ask her: "What are you doing with that frat guy?"

"What frat guy?", she asks. "Do you mean Jackson?"

"Yes, I mean Jackson. What were you laughing with him about? Why was he clinging to you like that?" 

"He's not a frat boy."

"Don't care. Answer my question."

"Hey, watch your tone when you speak to me", she states.

I look at the ground, mumble a quiet "sorry" and avert my gaze back to her eyes. 

"I was just talking to him after class. He asked me how our relationship was going and we just started chatting. And he wasn't even clinging to me, so I have no idea why you would say that. Anything else, or can I go back now?"

"The fuck you can't", I spit. I, then, realise that I could've worded that nicer, so I add: "I mean: no, I still need to tell you something."

She raises an eyebrow and waits for me to go on. 

"You need to kiss me."

"Why would I do that?" I see her tense. 

"Because Jackson needs to know you're off the market."

"I'm not-"

"To everyone else, yes, you are. We're dating. Right? So kiss me. What would everyone think when they see you constantly hanging around some annoying ass like Jackson? That would draw the kind of attention to us that I don't want to deal with."

"Then maybe you should do your task in this deal, too. If you don't bother actually helping me with physics, then why would I pretend to be your girlfriend?", she states firmly. And she's damn right. Only, I really can't tell her the truth. 

"We'll meet up later for physics."

"The test is Tuesday. We should've met up yesterday, as we planned. Why did you not show up?"

"I showed up-"

"When my roommate was already sleeping!", she whisper-shouts. "Why were you late, Sebastian?", she repeats. 

I remain silent. Her green eyes bore into mine. Her arms are crossed in front of her chest. She's annoyed. She has all the right to be. But as I already said, telling her about my dad is a total no-go. So instead I make something up. Something I already regret thinking about.

"Because I was fucking Janette."

Her annoyed expression falls. She doesn't even look like she's feeling something right now. 

"Oh", is all she says. 

I try to grab her arms but she pulls away and takes a few steps back. 

"Loïse, let me explain-"

"No. You've said enough."

"Loïse-"

"Let me go", she orders, when I realise I'm holding her wrist tightly. But I don't let go, not now. She needs to hear this first.

"Loïse, let me speak. I- I needed sex", I lie. "I don't mind that you don't want to waste your first time on me, but I still need sex in my life. Janette won't talk to anyone about this-"

"You're so pathetic", she scoffs. "You're telling me that I can't even talk to Jackson, but you allow yourself to basically cheat on me and fuck some sorority girl?!"

This is the first time I've ever heard her use the word 'fuck'. Not in a curse-kind of way, but it still makes me feel fucking bad about saying this to her. I let go of her wrist and she starts walking back to Jackson, as he's still waiting for her. 

"I need some time to think this over", she whispers before leaving. "I- I'm going to shut up now because otherwise, I'll say a lot of stuff I'll regret later."

I nod. 

"Okay", I whisper back. "Just please don't leave me hanging like this. I understand if you hate me now, but call me tonight. I need to know what you want to do now, okay?"

She nods and walks away, without looking back at me. 

.  .  .  .  .  .

Short chapter today, I know. 
Let me know your thoughts about the book in the comments! 
Feel free to give tips on my writing skills! :)

Little side-note: finals are starting soon, so I don't know if I'll be able
to update a lot. I'll try, though!

Surround yourself with positive energy!

- A.