No Matter What

A Photo Finish

Tonight was the night. It was the last night of Hanukkah. And while I'd miss the good food and the gifts, it was the last night for a while where I'd have to be packed in a house with a ton of people and socialize with all of them. I couldn't wait for my quiet nights at home again.

I put up my hair and threw on a gray and white maternity sweater. Now that my family knew, I didn't have to hide my little baby bump. And as of today, I was officially twelve weeks pregnant. I was pretty skinny, so I'd already been showing for the last week.

"I look so weird," I said to myself, looking at my reflection in the mirror.

With my baby bump, I really didn't look like myself. And with all the nerves and the nausea, I didn't feel like myself either. I felt like I was some kind of alien instead of who I was normally supposed to be.

"Ayla! Can you help me set the table?" my dad shouted from downstairs.

"Coming!" I said, heading down to the kitchen.

Hanukkah at our house was the best. By the eighth night, we were all exhausted. So, when my mom was still a single parent before she met my dad, she started her own tradition: Hanukkah Pizzas.

She was a single, busy, working mom, and she didn't have time to cook for the whole family. So, she called her favorite pizza place and ordered a big stack of pizzas, wings, salads, garlic knots, and cinnamon rolls for dessert. Our family grew to love it, and twenty years later, we were still doing it. My grandma and grandpa always brought a kosher pizza for themselves that we heated up.

I helped my dad bring the table all the way out through the dining room in the front of the house. We put on our good tablecloth, just to cover it with paper Hanukkah plates, cups, and napkins.

Our family arrived, then the pizzas. My dad lit the light up, battery-powered menorah in the dining room window, said the three blessings, then had some more downtime. After that, once the pizzas were nice and lukewarm, we sat down at the dining room table.

I sat next to Annie and we talked about more baby stuff. With our ten-year age gap, it was tough to find things we could bond about. What would be the odds that we'd both be having twins, and she was only a few weeks behind me. Annie was at eight weeks and two days, compared to my twelve weeks and zero days that I mentioned earlier.

"This is the one you absolutely have to get," Annie said, sneaking her phone under the table and showing me a super nice stroller. "It's called the UPPAbaby Vista. All the mom groups I see on Reddit say this is the gold standard, and that you shouldn't get any stroller other than this one."

"Annie, that's almost two-thousand dollars. Are you nuts?" I asked.

"Our dad is Doctor Green and my fiance is a lawyer," she said.

"I know he's the best dentist in town, but it's not like dad is a gazillionaire," I said.

Were strollers really this expensive? Why did baby stuff have to be so expensive? This didn't feel right or make any sense at all.

After enjoying the lovely reheated cinnamon rolls from the pizza place, it was time for presents. We each took turns picking our gifts off of the kitchen table. My gift bag held a new winter hat, some ginger chews for my nausea, and a few bottles of nail polish. At the bottom was a little box from my dad.

"Oh, I wonder what could be in there?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes. It was the last night of our festivities, so obviously the car was going to be tonight. I opened the top of the box, and there sat the car keys. My dad put a cute keychain on it that said: "Pluto will always be a planet to me." Damn right.

"Let's go see the car!" said one of my relatives.

"Everybody outside!" my dad said.

We all got up from the table and headed towards the entry hall. Everyone was crammed near the hall closet, throwing on their boots and coats. Some of my family members were filming me with their phones as I walked out to the front porch.

"No way! Are you serious?" I said, trying to collect myself.

I knew I was going to get a new car as a gift, but I never expected a minivan. A big, spacious, shiny white minivan with space for all my stuff. I could build myself a fort in the back and have lunch in there to avoid the noise of the cafeteria. I was going to put light blockers up on all the windows and just sit in sweet, sweet silence.

"What do you think, Ayla?" Annie said, filming me.

"It's amazing! It's so spacious!" I said.

"And that's not even the best part!" my dad said.

The door opened, and I saw Connor sitting in the back. I gasped as a ramp came down from the side of the van. Connor came down to me and I put my arms around him.

"How amazing is this?" he said as we pulled apart. "I can ride in the back with the kids to keep an eye on them, or I can just fold my chair up and sit in the front with you."

"That's perfect. I know it's such a pain in the ass for you to get in and out of your chair all the time," I said.

I smiled wide as my dad gathered our family in front of my brand new minivan. My dad took a photo of all of us. It had been so long since we'd taken a large family photo together. This would be a night I'd never forget.