DRESS || ( charlie dalton )

xvii. of numbness and lost futures

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊·̩̩̥͙

DRESS
(( — DEAD POETS SOCIETY — ))

—chapter xvii. of numbness and a lost futures

tw: mention of suicide and grief

LORAINE WAS STARING straight ahead, without even reacting to charlie's touch. it was like she didn't feel anything. she had pulled her knees up to the front of her body, closing her arms around her legs.

charlie tried to hug her. she didn't move.

"she's been like that all morning" she could hear thomas mutter. he was standing at the door, watching his sister worriedly.

charlie had come right after he had heard the news. but he had informed the rest of his friends before, as well as todd.

loraine had heard charlie tell thomas about tod's reaction. which was quite the opposite of hers. she did not say a word since she heard the news, while todd, unusual to his normal behavior tried to find a reason for what neil did, up and foremost blaming mr perry.

loraine did not know who to blame. she didn't know anything. she wasn't even sure if this right now was reality.

charlie was softly brushing through her hair. loraine couldn't feel his touch. she wished she could lean into it, hugging him and giving him the same comfort he was trying to give her. but she wasn't even able to receive his, so she continued to stare and sit still.

"did she say nothing at all?" it didn't help that charlie and thomas acted like she wasn't even there

"she screamed, louder than i have ever heard someone scream" thomas answered. he took a tissue and held it in charlie's direction, who dried the tears off his cheeks, without any use, because a second later, there were more following. "i picked her up and sat her down on the bed, she didn't say or do anything since then"

loraine couldn't even remember falling to the floor. but there was blood on her gown, from the scraped knees. and her hands were red from hitting the ground. at least that was what thomas was now telling charlie

charlie tried to catch her eyes, but to no avail. "should we get a doctor?" he asked. he sounded tired and loraine felt bad that he was caring for her even though neil had also been his friend. she tried to gather her strength and shook her head.

"i don't need a doctor" her voice was rasp and almost not there, her throat hurting from screaming. but hurt was good, it meant that she felt something.

thomas kneeled down in front of the bed. "what do you need, lori?" he brushed a hand over her scraped knee. more blood got soaked into the gown.

loraine turned her head to look at charlie. he looked even more worried than her brother. they shouldn't worry about her. they should worry about what had just happened. maybe neil was still alive. maybe someone had understood something wrong. maybe he was in the hospital, waiting for them to come visit him.

"where is neil?" she asked tiredly

charlie and thomas sighed, realizing that she still wasn't well.

charlie didn't know what to do. loraine, a girl he had always admired for the incredible strength with which she had carried herself, looked like a little girl again. her teary eyes slid over his face, trying to search for answers.

"neil's dead" charlie muttered softly. and when she fell, he caught her, holding her in his arms, her face against his chest, her tears staining his shirt.