To you in every life

My keys!

Lengthy huh, things are sometimes not meant for us, sometimes they are and now look at this conundrum that I have to face, not like I am making excuses for something bad I have done but not making excuses for something bad that I have done is more shameful for me, I feel like I am very open about the bad things I do, Is it true? Is it okay to be sad about things you shouldn't be? Like your friend being happy with another friend, your girlfriend being okay even if you are not there for a long time? Your parents not needing you? You realising how many dead plants you've been watering when you stop messaging first? Well different things hit differently, I know ironic right?

And all this somehow relates to my situation, no I am not in a relationship right now, not yet at least, Luna I like that name, better than Lucy, I got familiar with it and it felt more real than Lucy, it matched her personality, and Zach I don't think it ever matches my personality, I don't know what type of person I am, I have seen in a lot of movies where the main character is sleepless at nights and cant help but to think, he seems lost in thoughts and then there is me, to be honest I never want to think at night because my brain always think about one thing only and that thing hurts knowing that I have lost it somehow, my mistake, again;

"You are driving pretty fast there" I said as I watched her going off speeds

"Ha-ha, scared of speed?" she said making a comment

"No; I am scared of rushing things"

"Oh, you are no fun"

"Look I am slowing down okay, now stop giving me that look"

She released her foot from the accelerator and the winds were soundless now, we were more audible to each other

"What look?" I said adjusting my seatbelt

"That judgmental look, saying that you are stuck with me"

"Feels like you are assuming things"

"Am I?"

"You are, I don't let just anyone drive my car"

"You are making me feel more targeted now"

"Yeah, why is that," I said without looking at her

"Nah leave it"

"Come on I am already judging you"

"I knew it" we both laughed

"Yeah, maybe I should let it all out, maybe I am too old for keeping secrets now"

"You are never too old for keeping secrets" I said yawning

"Oh really" she said with a little side smile, probably wondering my disinterest in her,

"Yeah, my grandma told us that she never ever ate the diabetes pills we gave to her and threw them in the bin, just before she died"

"I am sorry, but that is hilarious and sad" she said controlling her laugh

"Don't be, I didn't love her much anyways"

A silence followed across the car, I realised that I have already destroyed my image in front of her by now,

"So, secrets, huh" she said obviously attempting every possible thing to break that awkwardness

"Yes ma'am"

She giggled

"What do you want to know sir"

"Well, that is a good question, let's know each other better first" I said staring at her wrists, probably more than I should have been

As she changed the gear her bracelet rolled down her slim wrists almost about to fall