The Summer Deal

Sixteen - I don't drink blood

To: thornequincy@googlemail.com

cc: quincythorne@collingwood.com

From: drsarahjgrant@googlemail.com

Subject: Life Update

Dear Quincy,

Today I got kicked out of a zoo because a monkey charmer taught three parrots and a family of mockingbirds how to curse.

And the worst part? The charmer has no guilt.

I hope to hear from you very soon.

Hugs and loads of coffee mugs,

Dr. Sarah Grant.

(Your extremely worried friend)

****

"So," Noah began, dragging the o. "I had fun today."

The look I gave him could freeze Antarctica all over again. "Just finish your oysters, Noah."

"Yes, mommy. Sorry, mommy," he said with a smug smile on his face. Control, Sarah. Control. "Won't you have one with me?"

I glanced at his plate filled with oyster shells and a raw, gooey substance floating inside it. The restaurant we were having our dinner at, recommended it as a specialty of theirs. Since I was treating Noah as an apology dinner for last night, he ordered the largest platter they had in the kitchen filled with oysters and different seasonings only to spite me more.

And it turns out, Noah loves oysters.

Out of every delicacy in the world, he had to choose bloody oysters! They are slimy and disgusting!

"No. Thank you for offering, Noah." I forced a smile. "But I am happy with my food."

"You mean your imaginary food." We were exhausted from our day, but Noah still managed to spend every minute annoying me. "Are you sure you don't want to eat anything else? That corn soup you had..." he eyed the opposite empty side of our table where I was sitting as if it had done something wrong, "... was less. Very less. You should gain your energy back. I don't think that soup was sufficient enough for you."

I took a sip of my water. "Thank you for your concern, Noah, but I'm still full from our late lunch. I just want to go back to my room and have a good night's rest."

"You're not a half-vampire, are you?"

Noah got us blacklisted from the zoo because he couldn't control his sailor's mouth in the right place. I didn't even know something like that was possible. I was so done with him for today. "No. I am not," I answered, brushing my hair with my fingers and tucking it behind my ear. I chose not to notice how Noah caught on with the act. "I don't drink blood, and I don't sleep in a coffin."

"I have been watching movies lately and—"

"Of course, you were." Again.

"—And there was this scene where the guy takes a girl to a restaurant, but he doesn't eat anything. Sounds familiar? In the end, he knocks up the girl, and when she gives birth, he turns her into a vampire."

I kept my face straight. With everything that happened today, I was going to keep myself cool, calm, and composed around him. "I have never been a fan of movies. I find them a waste of my time."

"So what I'm asking is..." His expression turned serious. "You're not going to get me pregnant, are you?"

A waitress passed behind Noah, and she failed to cover her shocked face. Cool, calm, composed, I reminded myself. Cool, calm, and composed.