The Nightmare Has Only Begun

Chapter Seventeen

(Jonhathan)

To say my dad is confused to Chris's visit no one was expecting during dinner time can be an understatement. No, I'm pretty sure he is perplexed and unsure of exactly who it is my mom answered the door to. He is beyond words not understanding in the slightest way who Chris is and why he is here except for the fact my mom said Chris was a friend. Yet even that information doesn't make sense to him to recall a friend from high school.

"You should leave." he tells Chris.

"Yeah...I-I'll see you another time Jonhathan."

"Yeah sure." I say less than enthusiastically as I turn back to watch him walk away. Taking off from the door and away from being trapped inside the house unable to escape this nightmarish world I'm living.

First I have parents that care and then old crushes walk back in acting as if he wasn't responsibility for making me want to give up on living. What next?

"Maybe he shouldn't come around anymore." he says shutting the door as I watch the last of the sun outside disappear.

"I don't know why you pretend to care." I mumble before walking away.

"Jonhathan.."

"No I don't care what you have to say. You're just like Chris. You cared in the beginning then pushed me to the side later. You stopped caring and criticized me when you did acknowledge my existence."

He knows nothing about me. He doesn't know who I was or who I am now. He doesn't know much as he tries with my mom to make up for lost time. Trying now to be this dad he never was back then and it pisses me off. It irritates me and I just want to yell at them. I want to tell them it doesn't work that way. They don't get another chance. They don't get to change now and be what I always wanted them to be. They don't get to hardly be in my life paying attention to being there hovering over me. Making up by trying to fight my battles they think I have because I don't want to believe them about Jared.

How can they understand though? Why would he know anything about my life before I took off to be with Jared?

My dad obviously didn't know I was being bullied though I tried to talk to him about it plenty of times. He didn't know Chris was the one to bully me in school from sixth grade on. He didn't know about my crush on Chris and it led to the bullying because it was spread across school faster than I can deny it. He didn't know the teachers weren't making it any better. He had little involvement in my life growing up because he was always busy with work. He was busy trying to make my mom happy and forgot somewhere along the years he had a son. His life didn't include me most of the time until suddenly now I'm back and my parents are back together too.

"Is something wrong?" she asks once I walk back and take a seat at the table next to Jayden.

"Everything's fine." I say giving a weak smile at Jayden to my side.

"Is it?" she asks moving her attention away from me to my dad as if my answer wasn't the right one she was searching for.

It never is to anyone though I don't know why I think it ever will.

"Yeah everything is fine." he lies and it doesn't surprise me. He's probably not mentioning it because he doesn't want to come to terms with the truth.

"If I knew Chris was going to bring something up to upset you I would have told him to leave. I just thought since you both were friends-"

"Friends?" I laugh not believing the words out of her mouth. I can't even believe she remembers Chris being my friend when I thought she was too absorbed in herself back then. "We haven't been friends since sixth grade."