Johnlock - Oneshots

Quiet

Listen to 'Quiet' by EXES

He wasn't sure how it happened, but it did. He knew it wasn't right but once it had started he didn't know how to stop.

John had come to visit 221B after a particularly bad fight with Mary. They had sat on the couch for hours, talking it over, tears welling in John's eyes but never falling, ever the soldier. And then he had said something that made Sherlock's heart skip a beat.

"I don't love Mary." It was barely a whisper out of the lips of the man beside him, but it was loud enough for Sherlock to hear. 

"What do you mean, John?"

"I don't love Mary," he repeated, looking down at his lap, "I mean I did, before, before you, before..." 

John's voice had trailed off. Sherlock remembered how he had reached out, instinctively to lift John's chin with his hand, and he had left it there, fingers brushing lightly against the stubble on his cheek. 

"Before you left, I was so madly in love with you... but then you died and I moved on, well I tried to. And I found Mary and I loved her, but then you returned and I realized that I couldn't do it."

"Couldn't do what John?" Sherlock's brain was working in overdrive attempting to process that John had said to him, had John Watson just told him he was in love with him?

"I couldn't, no, I can't be in love with someone else when I know that there's still a chance for us, however small it is."

"John I..." 

For the first time in his life Sherlock was unable to form the words to express what he was feeling. He stared into the dark blue eyes of his best friend, and then moved his gaze to his lips. He was unsure who had initiated it, but suddenly they were kissing, both forgetting completely about Mary and Rosie and all other responsibilities in their lives. They had kissed for what felt like hours, yet seconds all at the same time, until John had pulled away, jumping off the couch.

"Sherlock, oh god, Sherlock, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry but this," He gestured between the two of them, "this cannot happen again."

And with that John had ran out of the flat, back to the house that he lived in with his wife and daughter. 

***

Sherlock trudged through the streets of London, still busy despite being a quarter to midnight. He headed along a familiar street, ducking into an alleyway. He pressed his back against a wall, pulling his phone from his pocket to check the time, 11:52. Suddenly he felt a hot breath on his neck, startling him, he mentally scorned himself, wondering how he had approached without Sherlock noticing. But all throughts on whether or not his deduction skills were slacking off were dispersed when the pair of lips connected themselves with the soft spot on the detectives neck. He let out a light moan, receiving a chuckle against this skin, as the smaller man wrapped his arms around his waist. 

"John" he breathed out, as the doctors lips began to travel up neck to his jaw. 

When he received nothing but a murmur in response, he tried again, attempting to making his voice more assertive, "John."

"Yes love?" John pulled away slightly, looking up into Sherlock's eyes, his pupils were displayed, and his face bore the smile he reserved only for his detective. 

"We can't keep doing this John, I love you and I want to be with you, I really do," he squeezed the doctors hand, watching his face fall, "but we can't be together, not like this."

Sherlock watched as a single tear rolled down John's cheek, in the years he had known him he had hardly ever cried, expect when Sherlock 'died' but that was never something he was supposed to see. 

"Please, Sherlock, don't - don't do this to me... please." Johns voice became softer and softer, and it took all of Sherlock's willpower to not start crying himself. 

He let in a deep breath, "I'm sorry John."

He walked away, back out the way he had came, he didn't turn around, eyes fixed on the street ahead, as to not see the looks of utter disbelief and misery plastered on the face of the man he loved more than anything else in the world.

And I'll keep it quiet 

And I'll keep it hush 

And I meant tonight 

That I'm never gonna give you up