Not the Villain - The Evil Queen's Retelling of Snow White

19 Years Ago

19 years ago:

Our wedding would've been perfect, had Casimir not been crying.

18 years, two months and 28 days ago:

Today was the party that I had planned for a whole month. It's the first anniversary of the rebellion, so in commemoration I had organised a large feast in the courtyards of the palace where everyone, aristocrat and peasant alike, was invited to attend, with the trivial fee of two gold coins. 

It was Snow White, the demon child's first birthday, too, and in the dining hall of the palace there was a separate feast for her. 

I was celebrating for another reason, though.

Today was also the anniversary of Evelyn's death.

I was jolted back to reality by a maid's voice. "Your Majesty? the King has disappeared."

I frowned, then stopped, retaining my composure and a calm, indifferent expression. "What do you mean, disappeared? Did anyone check the garden? I think he would be at Evelyn's grave." I sighed, wishing he wouldn't visit it for hours every single day. He's been at it for a year already.

If I died, would he visit my grave every single day for a year?

"N-no, sorry, your majesty, we haven't checked the garden."

"Well, then, hurry along, the party is about to start."

"Y-yes, your majesty." She squealed, then hurried away.

I looked down at the baby in my lap. Snow White gurgled, then reached up to pull a lock of hair that fell out of my bun. I gently pushed her hand away. "You naughty baby," I scolded, half-smiling. It was never easy to raise a baby, but for the past year I had treated her as my own. It was easy to forget that she was an evil demon when she smiles up at you, watching you with those large, adorable, green eyes of hers. 

The bell tower rang 12 times, reminding me of the night a year ago... 

It is time.

The maid ran back. "The King has ordered that he is not to be disturbed for the entirety of today. He wishes you the best of luck for the feast."

I pursed my lips to keep from swearing under my breath. "Tell the guards to open up the gates."

"Yes, your majesty."

I had promised the public a speech. I should've known not to trust Casimir on the anniversary of Evelyn's death. Once again I felt a flash of annoyance at him.

I listened to the crowd flooding into the courtyard. Then I opened the doors, stepping up onto a raised podium. I turned my head to the left and to the right at the sea of eager faces. They respect me. I realised. They trust me, maybe even more than they trust their King.

I smiled. Turns out I don't need Casimir for a speech.

17 years, 5 months and 14 days ago:

The night was silent. I tossed and turned in my bed, unable to sleep. At last I stood up, my heart pounding, and walked towards the wall.

I marvelled at how I felt so lonely, even with a husband, an almost-daughter, and a palace full of people under my command. The only people who would be beside me, comforting me, are dead. Even this long after Evelyn's death, Casimir wouldn't speak more than a few terse sentences to me every week, and would never touch me at all. 

I started crying. What did Evelyn give him that I can't? What must I do for just a single, heartfelt kiss from him? Why is it that whatever I do, I'm simply not enough for him? Is it that hard to love me? Love. Was it always doomed to fail? Was it doomed to be given out unhesitatingly, only to be thrown into an infinite abyss?

With trembling fingers, I caressed the side of the mirror. 

I whispered, "Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?"