40: Love This for You

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The more 'confused' Paige became, in her words, the more I liked her

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The more 'confused' Paige became, in her words, the more I liked her.

A lot.

I liked talking with her, making her smile, touching her, and feeling her touch me. I probably liked the touching too much.

Starting with Homecoming, my boners popped out in the most embarrassing moments. I don't think she noticed the one while we danced or when her hand landed on my thigh in the limo ride home, but my dick betrayed me. No matter how many unsexy thoughts I could think of, the smell of coconut lotion on her skin and her barely audible gasps like they were just for me did nothing to ease the third club in my pants.

My hand on her hip felt right. The way she arched into me made my pulse race like hers when I tucked my chin over her shoulder and helped her golf.

The ache was insane, and how quickly I relieved myself in the shower at home should've concerned me. Doing it before seeing Paige kept the 'situation' under control whenever we pretended to be a touchy couple.

She didn't seem ready to talk about the chemistry between us, and distance wasn't what I wanted, but it wasn't my choice. The next two weeks were road trips for two away games and recruiting trips. I thought about her, smiling at each video or photo I posted and people's reactions.

Vi's idea to carve pumpkin heads was better in theory. They were smelly and slimy, but Paige cupping her pumpkin's cheeks and lifting one foot was cute.

There were some negative comments, but I deleted them. The positivity was insane, but several people noticed Paige's skin during the painting class and asked genuine, curious questions. I left them unanswered.

"Whew." Mom sighed and dragged her suitcase to her room. "Glad to be back."

I was, too. Oregon and Oregon State ruled out me wanting to go out of state. The second weekend's west-coast trip took us from California State University to UC-Merced. CSU offered my first scholarship offer. It was a small D-1 program and university, but Fresno wasn't much farther away from the big schools around LA.

The best part of my recruiting trips? I went as Brody Hightower, not Brody McCallister. My court date was nerve-wracking, and I sweated enough to soak my dress shirt under my suit. It was all formalities, a judge asking me for my verbal assurance of wanting to change my name. My paperwork was correct, and with one ink stamp from him, my name was changed. Changing my phone, bank account, and birth certificate took longer, but it was done. Mom stayed silent, wearing a sad look as we filled out one name-change form after another.

Our road trips solidified my decision to stay at an in-state school. Mom was alone but refused to date anyone, including Mr. Reynolds. She deserved to follow through on those feelings but was so stubborn.

"I'm fine," she waved off the subject whenever I brought up their googly eyes at each other during our Seattle trip. Logan got dismissed when he asked. "Glad to be home."

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