Can't Let Go

twenty five

Arsalaan's heart was beating rapidly as she laid her head on his chest, hugging him tightly. This moment felt so surreal, he felt like pinching himself to check if this was happening in real or was it a dream. It felt like it. His swollen lips and dishevelled hair did say otherwise.

"Malaika..." Zayn's voice startled them both, as they sat up with a jerk, looking at each other with wide eyes. The bang on her door increased as she gave a nervous look to her husband, who nodded at her and sets her hair and necklace. A shy smile appeared on her face as she recollected their previous moments.

"Are you okay, Malaika?" came Zayn's concerned voice. "Yes, Zayn Bhai." even after getting back her memories, she continued to call him that surprised everyone in the family, and now Arsalaan was added to the list too.

"Chachi is asking for y..." his voice was cut off in the middle and a frown appeared on his face as he saw Arsalaan standing behind her. Just a look at them and he could guess what has happened. An unknown emotion passed through him as he turned his attention towards his cousin, who looked flustered.

"Everyone is asking for you." with one curt nod, Zayn left from there and Malaika heaved an inward sigh as she shuts the door again and turned to look at her husband, who was snooping in her room.

"This shirt..." Arsalaan's eyes fell on a shirt, his favourite white shirt that laid on her bed. A knowing smile played on his lips as he turned to look at her, "you stole this."

Her mouth opened wide in shock as she gave him a dirty look, "I didn't steal anything. I just took it with me, that's all." shrugging innocently, Malaika took the white shirt in her hands. This has been with her every single night, for the past few months. No one knew about this, but she'd put it on and then would sleep, it reminded her of the nights they cuddled and slept. Even in anger, she wouldn't deny the fact that she has missed him terribly.

Arsalaan could guess what she was thinking with the way her face changed colours.

"I don't even deserve you, but I'm too selfish to let you go, Malaika." he smiled sadly as he held her hands in his, she shook her head in negative, "whatever you did. The way we got married, how cruel and heartless you behaved on that day. I tried to understand it from your point of you, and I think I do get why you behaved the way that day. I did hate you at first." She mumbled while keeping the shirt back on the bed.

"I won't justify my actions in any way. I- That was the truth, I wanted to keep my sister alive and happy and that day what I did, it felt like the only way and I was too late to realize how low I've stooped. Seeing you cry and beg me clenched my heart. I wouldn't lie. But my sister's love has blinded my heart completely and I'm truly ashamed of whatever I did and I have no rights to ask this, but yet I'm asking, please come back to me. I cannot survive without you, Malaika... Please forgive me if you can," tears of regret and shame flown down his cheek and she gave him a sad look.

"I'm not a saint, but I do want to forgive you for both of our sake, Arsalaan. I want to be strong enough to forgive something as big as that, and I am. I am forgiving you now, I've thought about it a lot and this is for the best." her anger slowly vanished, she felt light now and was clear with what she wanted.

"The days I have spent with you, I have seen you regret and cry in the prayer mat every single day. I didn't understand why you cried at that time, I have questioned you many times and your answer never satisfied me but now it did, and honestly... I'm not the one who holds grudges." he looked at his wife with a glint in his eyes. Why was she so perfect?

"If I keep that one flaw aside, I've liked everything about you, Arsalaan. You were an amazing husband to me, and I missed you so much. The time without you has been like hell." a drop of tear rolled down her cheeks which he wiped off almost immediately. Wrapping his arms around her, he pulled her into his embrace and she gladly hugged him back.