A Familiar Prison

Chapter 25

Pacing the bedroom, Gwen was lost in her thoughts. Now that I've decided to go, I just need to figure out when. I can say I'm going for a walk, and just leave. I'll leave my note behind so they know nothing happened to me, but I can't keep putting those I love through this. When I leave, AJ will forget all about me. He will be able to move on, find a better wife for him, and then I'll just... I don't know what I'll do, because I won't marry anyone else. They'll just have the same issues to deal with from me. I'll just get another job, find an apartment, and live single for the rest of my days, however long or short that may be.

Gwen took a shaky breath. She sat down and put her head in her hands. Am I overthinking this? It was a dream... she sighed. But dreams can be revealing. What does that say about what he really thinks of me? He must blame me for everything that's gone on. Tears brimmed her eyes. I know I would blame me. I do blame me for all of this. If I just hadn't been kidnapped in the first place... The tears fell onto her lap. I just need to leave and all will be right. AJ will be safe, he will fall in love with someone else, and he will be happy then. If I'm miserable, it doesn't matter— it's all about keeping him safe. Gwen looked up.

I'll get on the computer and look up bus times and fares, purchase the ticket, and then just leave. I may have to change busses, it may take a couple days, but I'll go back home. I don't know what I'll tell Mom and Dad, but I'll think of something. I just... I can't stay here. I can't keep putting the love of my life through that. He deserves so much better. She looked around the room.

Maybe I should just leave now. He probably wouldn't notice because he's working. I know he blocks out all around him when he's working. I could go out the back door. Or, even just tell him I'm going for another walk. He won't realize the time to know I haven't been back in a while, then he'll find the note, and know why I left and he'll be safe. It'll be too late to look for me by then. I'll already be on my way back to Maryland. With tears streaming down, she sat down at the desk and got out her journal. She decided to write one last entry as Mrs. Gwendolyn Pinkerton. She would get back home, file the paperwork, and then become Miss Gwendolyn Saltzman again. AJ would be free from her, and she wouldn't have to worry about his safety, because he would be safe from her.