➢ CHAPTER NINETEEN

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MONDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 1996

Lev awoke to a mind that felt foggy, as it was still early when his alarm tore him from his restless sleep. As he often did, he dreamed of (Y/N). Some nights, his brain was filled with the happy days of their relationship. Others, of their breakup. Sometimes he dreamed of things that hadn't happened. Like beautiful memories from another life. But last night, he'd dreamed of (Y/N), screaming and crying and trying to kill herself.

Needless to say, it wasn't a very restful night for him.

As he sat up in bed, and raked a hand through his white hair, he noticed the distinct scent of a warm breakfast── more specifically, pancakes...?

Upon Lev's entrance into the kitchen, his suspicions were confirmed. (Y/N) stood in the middle of the kitchen, flipping pancakes. He smiled softly. She seemed so in her element here that it warmed his heart── and only added to his belief that she'd be happier if she stayed with him forever.

"Hope you're hungry," (Y/N) remarked, breaking Lev from his thoughts.

"I am," he answered, stepping closer to lean against the counter beside her. "It smells delicious." Lev had always known she was a good cook, but it seemed he was continually reminded of it as of late.

"Thanks," she muttered, keeping most of her attention on the meal she was preparing.

Lev took the opportunity to admire her. God, she was gorgeous. He missed seeing her so at ease around him.

But then he remembered what it took to bring her here, all the pain she'd experienced── not just the past few days, but her whole life── and he felt guilty. He shouldn't be so happy to have her here, not when her mother's suicide attempt is the only reason why. And yet...

"Alright, it's done." She handed him a plate with a smile.

...He couldn't help it. (Y/N)'s presence always made him happy. She had this innate way of making him feel so light, so... weightless. He'd do anything to keep that feeling. And he'd do so much more to make her feel the same way.

"Thanks," he said, taking the plate and setting it down on one of the counters. He hopped onto the barstool in front of it, and watched as (Y/N) made a plate for herself. She sat down beside him, and began eating.

"So..." she said after a moment, (E/C) eyes glancing around. "This is your new apartment?"

Lev hummed. "Yeah, moved in over the weekend."

"That's cool." (Y/N) took another bite. "It's a nice place."

A smile spread across his lips at her approval. "Glad you like it," he said. "My mom seemed pretty emotional about me moving out. She'd been so ready right up until we brought the last box in." His mom cried. It was hard, harder than he thought it'd be. His mom had been so supportive through everything. All their fights. His dad dying. And, most recently, his breakup with (Y/N). He'd miss her, more than words could describe.

"Well, you can always visit, y'know," (Y/N) commented after a moment.

Lev smiled. "Yeah, she told me her door's always open if I want some more of her pelmeni."

"Do you think she'd be willing to give me that recipe?" she asked.

"Only if you come over and visit her, too."

(Y/N) laughed warmly at that. "Of course I will. I'll do anything for that recipe," she added jokingly.

Lev chuckled. He watched her lovingly as she ate. After a moment of quiet, he said,  "Y'know... I wish I had spent more time learning her recipes."

"You don't know how to cook?" (Y/N) seemed surprised.

He shook his head. "No, not really. I mean, I know a few dishes. But they're pretty simple... All I really know how to do is boil pasta."

"...I could teach you, if you want."

"You cook?"

"I made you breakfast, didn't I?" (Y/N) playfully rolled her eyes, before resting her chin on her hand, and glancing over at him. "I started learning when I was around eight or so."

"Eight?" Lev's eyebrows rose. "That's pretty young."

She shrugged. "Yeah, well..." Her expression visibly deflated.

'Right,' he thought. 'Her mom... I can't believe I said that.'

"How are the pancakes?"

He was somewhat stunned by how easily she'd changed the subject. It seemed to come so naturally to her. In seconds, she'd changed her facial expression to one that seemed so... carefree. It made him realize── she'd had a lot of practice at this. Lying, hiding things, making herself look strong. He thought back to every time in their relationship he could think of where she changed the subject like that. It happened a lot, now that he thought of it. Probably more than he could even think of now. And he'd never noticed. His heart broke at the thought.

He smiled, somewhat sadly. "It's good," he told her. "You did a really good job."

The rest of the meal was finished in silence.

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heyo! sorry for the late update. life's been pretty busy. hopefully i'll return to more frequent updates soon :)

𝐈𝐃𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐙𝐄 (yandere x reader)Where stories live. Discover now