The lonely wolf [bxb]

Mixed feelings

(Ryker)

“And where do you think you're going? You have only just arrived here, but here you are running already when you should be spending time with your mate.” Dad said, as I glared at him, feeling annoyed by his presence.

“I'm a grown ass man who doesn't need to answer to you or mom. Where I go should not be any problems of yours.” I replied in a harsh tone, Dad started shaking his head as he looked at me with disappointment.

“So we are back to square one? It's a lucky thing the elders already left, if they were to see you like this, I'm sure they wouldn't hesitate to take your title from you.” He's acting as if I gave a damn. If it's the alpha title they wanted so badly, they can have it for all I care.

“I'm not going to stay here and argue with you old man, I have things to take care of. Now, if you'll excuse me…" I said as I made a move to leave. But instead I was stopped by what my father had said.

“I don't even know where your mother and I went wrong. We raised you and Ryland the correct way, but it seems as if the goddess is angry at us for whatever reason, I'm not certain.” He sighed as he looked at me with pleading eyes.

“I know why you're running, Ryker. The feelings, it's all new to you. It scares you so bad that you would use anger and frustration as an excuse. You're afraid of love, to loving someone. Instead, you are running like a coward. Ruining what I'm sure would be a good thing for you.” I opened my mouth to answer him, but he held his hand up, stopping me.

“You are no coward, son. I've never seen you backed down from anything before, so don't let this be the first. Try to find a way to work with Elias, or you'll only lose him in the end.” With that, he walked away, leaving me angrier than before.

I wasn't running from anything, and I sure as hell wasn't a coward. He knows damn well when my temper gets out of control, I have to be on pack grounds. If I'm not here, then it will only lead to disaster.

'If you aren't running, why did you lock Elias in a room by himself?' Max asked, and I groaned out of frustration.

'Let me take over this once, if you're that afraid, let me handle Elias for now.' He suggested, but I couldn't do that. That was the cowards way out, and I would rather fight my battles.

'I have everything under control, you don't have to worry about me or Elias.' I replied, but it only angered max.

'But he's my mate as well! My damn mate! I haven't gotten a chance with him because you kept on acting like a fucking idiot. Now Elias won't trust us because of what you did, sometimes I wonder if you have any brain cells, or they were damaged from you being too stupid!' He shouted his insults over and over until I grew tired of them and blocked him.

My plan was to go searching for rogues, to end their pathetic lives, but the talk from dad and max had left me feeling irritated. Who do they think they are talking to, a fucking child? They should be happy that Elias and I accepted each other and I don't want to kill him anymore.

I even started calling him by his name instead of mutt, which was a huge effort, right? This shit was too complicated, even for me. So I decided against going on a killing spree and headed back towards the pack house instead.

It took a couple of minutes before I realized that I was standing in front of Elias's door. What the hell am I doing here? I opened the door without knocking because yes, it's my house, and I'm free to do what I want.

I saw Elias standing by the window with his back turned to me. The palm of his hand was placed on the glass as he stared out at the scenery that he was barred from.

'I know you're there, I can smell your rusty scent from here.' He said as he turned to look at me. I growled at him, not liking the fact that he had the nerves to insult me.

“As if your scent is any different. It smells like dead people in here.” I responded back, which had him narrowing his eyes at me.

'Why are you here?' He asked as he went back to staring out the window.

“I have no idea, but my guess would be to check on you just to make sure you weren't stealing anything. I'd have to resort to a harsh punishment if that was the case.” Gosh, Ryker shut the hell up. When did I even get like this? Oh, I know you were always like this.

'I can smell the lie in that statement, Ryker.' He Said, and I shook my head, trying to think of something else to say.

“It was max, he sort of um took over and brought me here. I'll leave now, so you won't have to worry.” I said as I hightailed it out of there, closing the door behind me quickly. I breathed a sigh of relief as a nervous laugh left me.

That's one of the biggest lies I've ever told. I blocked max, so I had to come up with something or Elias would think that I was starting to have feelings for him. That was embarrassing as hell, I hope I never have to put myself through that again.

I don't even know why I was there in the first place, it was like something was drawing me to him. A power like I've never felt before. It was strange, all the thoughts of killing had been erased from my mind as I found myself standing next to him. A mixture of emotions I couldn't escape from that was grasping me by my shirt and pulling me towards him.

Our bond was getting stronger, the more we were apart, the harder it was for me. I don't know about him, but that was how I felt. Dad was probably right, if I had just gotten over my fear, then maybe I could give this a chance. If only I wasn't so stubborn, that's the only thing that's keeping me from starting over, and that was a burden I was willing to carry with me for as long as I can.