2014. February 2.
There are times when you can't hide. The wood is not thich and dense enough because it's in your head. All in your head. Mashing up, while you're drifting away from reality slowly and carefully, so you don't even notice it. It just happens.
As my first ballett attempt. I wasn't my own decision, I only intended to watch some movies since I felt exhausted and overwhelmed by...by things I can't decribe right now. I realised that even at a young age I didn't have time to waste precious minutes to watch bullshit like I do this whole week. I wanted something to swallow me up and forget all of the real, phisical world which means nothing to me just blood. Blood.
I wanted to hide.
Unlikely I couldn't.
Any show, not the the dumbest, most threatening, or heart melting could prevent remembering. I looked in the mirror of my past. And then I couldn't take it.
I saw my parents screaming into my face, begging, fear rushed through me as more than a week ago. I felt I was there again. My chest was heavy filled with waves and trash, spit and disgust. I couldn't breathe but I smelled blood and cigarette.
Cigarette.
There was a secret place near the dorms where the girls could smoke without notice. I remembered their laugh and I heard my mother's yell. We were going to class, I streched and a man yelled next to my ear. I thought I was going to be deaf. Everybody was moving, but I didn't understand what happened. All the girls heard what had to be done. They were spinning.
- Focus! - the teacher shouted and glared at me. - I'm going to kill ya! I'm going to fucking kill ya!
- Focus! - it's her. It's her. - Dance, girl!
Dance macabre...
- Dance! - she yelled.
I had to hurry, my muscles moved from the couch and I left the laptop there. To move. I had to move when I couldn't hide.
The screams didn't fade, they were still there, like the extraneous blood running in my vanes.
I am spinning and spinning. I am focused. I am awake. The screames and all the blood lift me. I am weightless. Spinning and spinning. I jump. I remember the coreography. I am laughing, like the girls in the class. Until something breaks or crashes. Pain. In my neck, I am half conscious. My mother cries.
- Nice spin, girl. - the teacher said. - Nice spin...
The pain spreads on my body, and I see my bones shaking when I collapse. The floor swims in pure, red blood.
I'm dead.
- It was beautiful. - time finally stopped. I fell on the floor, hardly breathing like I was out of my mind and in front of me stood he.
- Priest Joseph. - I murmured.
- You dancing. It's purely beautiful. - he smiled and stepped closer.
I cried. He hugged me.
YOU ARE READING
My first times
Vampire- So? - I whispered in his ears and I could smell his scent. - What? - Do you feel yourself in danger? - I don't see why should I - he said leaning even closer so that I could feel his breathe, moreover I could touch his pulsing vein, the life r...
