My first times

Our first visit

2018. April 13.

Since the phonecall I'm not very talketive or not really happy in general. I wached some shows with Kazimier, but he noticed it's better if he just gives me some space to process everything.

The weekend seemed an exception though, because when we visited the hospital somehow Kazmier and Priest Joseph made the mood pleasent. I witnessed how great relationship they developed, how close they actually are, what a wild and beautiful journey they had together. They made me laugh, told me stories of Kazimier's childhood, anecdotes, probably I would never hear otherwise.

When Kaz went out to get something from the buffet, I asked him about Elias and the tales he told me.
- ...Kazimier's friend who...who was killed. By vampires? Is-Is this true?

Priest Joseph looked me in the eye with his wise and calm gaze which made everyting so simple and believable.

- Yes, it's as true as I am here.
- B-but how can I tell him what I am? I mean he-he didn't believe in vampires and all that. It would hurt him and...
- You're right, Hanna, you're right. But both of you have to make peace with your past. It's not going to be neccesserily easy. However you have to trust him, because he saw you in a way even I didn't. And that's gonna make him so strong that he will endure whatever you tell him. You made him strong. You make him trust you. And he will make you understand what love means. He will make you see what life is. I couldn't give you that. This is why you had to leave.

Afterall I couldn't tell him about my parents' murderer, that he showed up again but I think it was better without it. We enjoyed our time in spite of the circumstances.

When we finally had to leave I felt tired but somehow relieved. But that didn't last so long. In the back of my mind words got stuck and always wanted to surface from my thoughts.
So as we were driving out of the city I suddenly asked him:
- Can we make one more stop? It's really near by. My grandma's house. I promised her that I'll say hi if I'm here.
- Well, we can make a quick by-pass.

So after a good twenty minutes I navigated us to the house of my childhood and the place where I've been brought up until I turned six years old. I felt nervous. I haven't been here for ages. Pretty long time actually. 
- Should I come too? - Kazimier asked.
- No. It's just a few minute, ok?
- Yeah, sure. I'll wait here, then.

What I did, in fact, I broke into my grandma's house. She wasn't at home to my luck and I knew where to find the keys. Old people never change.

I was taken aback when I stepped into the house. Memories, old feelings, nostalgia. I got depressed a bit of this mix but I knew exactly what I came for which is a photoalbum. I hoped that if I go through the old pictures I find someone who could be close to us, maybe even have ulterior motives which would explain why would someone kill my family. Max said that this person had to be a good friend or must had a good relitionship with my family. Maybe I find him, because I saw him several times. I can identify him.

I went to the living room, and dragged out the drawers. And there it was! I used to look at this for hours. As soon as I got what I wanted, I  felt the urge to leave but when I wanted to close the drawer I noticed something else. Another photoalbum. One I've never seen.

I put down the one in my hands and grabbed this heavy and seemingly old album. Turned to the first page: a photo of my parents getting married. I was familier with this one. Maybe it's a small one of only them?
Second page: mom in the hospital. Somehow she looked so much younger. Maybe the lights, or something.
Third page: mom holding a new born baby. beneath the photo there was a date and a name.
1984. October 8. Ákos.
A baby boy.

It was just the first shock but I couldn't take anymore so a grabbed both of the albums and hurried out to Kazimier. He took me home. I started talk constantly, I insisted when he wanted to go shower, or to buy some food. I didn't want him to leave me alone because I was afraid of that album. I was so right...

At night I opened it again, because I couldn't sleep.
Page twenty: mom with her ten year old kid, in the hospital again. The boy didn't have any hair. He looked ill but still smiled.

Then the pictures of a fifteen year old boy with the exactly same face of my murderer, just less wicked.

After finishing the album I figured that he had a disease. In one picture it seemed he was treated for cancer. The last time I wrote I would do anything to save Priest Joseph. What if my parents thought the same way and did it? What if they turned this boy to a vampire? And after that what? Why would he kill them? Why would he kill those who saved him?