What You Caused

68.

a/n i like the concept of this chapter hehe and it's quite long too :)

Chapter 68 | Laying in the rain & bookshops

Isabella:

We get back to asking and answering the basic questions again and it continues on like this for a while.

I end up finding out a lot more from Lucas, ranging from what his favourite car is to what his favourite sex position is all whilst the sky continues to grow increasingly darker and the clouds grow more angry looking.

When the wind picks up even more and a gust surges through us, Lucas halts our quick fire questioning.

"I think we should head back to the car before it starts raining," he says, pointing at the sky just as the first drops of rain begin pelting down on our skin. "You're finished right? If you are we can begin to pack up."

My eyebrows draw together. "Finished what?"

Lucas gestures to the plate in my lap and I follow where his finger is pointing.

I blink once. Then twice.

"Where's all the food gone?" I exclaim, glancing down at my empty paper plate. I shake it upside down like I'm expecting the food to appear out of the inside of the plate or something.

When I gaze back up at Lucas he's smirking like crazy. "I guess you managed to eat it all, Izz," he says proudly with a shrug of his shoulders.

"How?..." I glance back down at the empty plate then back up at him. Realisation then floods through me. "You sly fuck," I say accusingly and in a slow manner. "You did that question game to distract me didn't you?"

"Yeah," Lucas grins. "I even fed you mango pieces and you didn't even notice."

I gape at him, then back down to the picnic blanket where only empty food packaging lay. The packets of food are all empty, it's only rubbish that's left.

I ate everything that was on my plate.

Oh fuck.

The corner's of my lips tip down into a frown and twisting in my stomach makes a reappearance. I ate that all. I ate that all.

Shit.

Slight nausea begins to overwhelm me and I nibble on my bottom lip, eyes still flitting across all the empty food packets.

Sensing my unease, Lucas leans forward and tips my chin up with his index finger so that I'm making eye contact with him.

"Hey," he says, eyes darting back and forth between my eyes. "Progress," he reminds me with a raise of his eyebrows, levelling me with a steady look. "Remind yourself this is progress. You did well Bella."

That's right. Progress. It's progress.

I stare into Lucas' hazel eyes and seeing the slight pride in them eases me. I begin to nod slowly and square my shoulders before pushing away the tightening in my stomach and the flutter in my chest also. "You're right," I blow out a breath. "This is an accomplishment. This is the first time I've eaten snacks like this in a long time."

"Yes, exactly." Lucas' mouth curls into a small smile. "That's my girl."

I shoot him a small smile as he pulls back and begins to collect all the rubbish, stuffing them into various target bags. I begin to help him - the tidying helping to pre occupy my thoughts.

As I help clear away our things, I continue to remind myself that it's a good thing that I ate, repeating it in my head like a mantra.

It's progress and this is what I want. I shouldn't feel bad about eating because it's a step forward in my recovery.