Infidelity

9

Today work is incredibly unbearable. The day is dragging on very slowly. I'm quickly running out things to do, to get him out of my mind.

By lunchtime I'm not even hungry. My stomach is in knots.

I rest my elbows on the counter and I cover my face with my hands. I massage my temples with my index fingers.

"Hello sunshine"

I recognize his slurry voice.
I smile behind my hands.

Why am I smiling?
What am I doing?

"It's only midday and you're drunk already", I say behind my hands. I can't remove my hands. He'll see me blushing and he'll use it against me.

"It's only midday and you're already depressing. You're way too young and beautiful to be acting this old and grumpy"

"Wow an insult and a compliment, classic gentleman"
"Honest gentleman", he corrects me.

"Whatever", I say incoherently

He removes my hands, slowly from my face. When he touches me, I can feel the softness of his hands even though they're cold.

My hands tremble inside of his and I can't bring myself to look at him.

He's such a dream.

"What's wrong", he seems genuinely concerned. But this could all be an act. Every guy is nice when he wants to get the girl.

"I'm just tired", I say to him.
"I'm sorry. I was a handful yesterday. I'm really stupid when I'm drunk"

He's apologizing? That's a first.

I roll my eyes at him.

"Honestly, I'm sorry", he seems sincere but I'm not buying it.
"Oh please...do you also apologize to every girl you've been with each morning?"

"Why are other girls significant when you're the only girl that's here?"

"So I'm right"

He raises an eyebrow.

"...that there are other girls"
"Are you jealous?"

Am I jealous?

"That's not important"
"Well that also makes them not important", he smirks.

"You're missing the point"
"The point is you", he states dramatically.

I groan in frustration.
"This is not a joke", I tell him.

"If you want me to cut all of them off, just say the words. Anything for you", he says.

"Of course. Up until the next better chicken, right?"

"You're not a chicken. You're a very beautiful person"
"It's a figure of speech", I roll my eyes.

"...and you my darling, you are the entire speech"

"It's not funny", I say trying not to laugh.
"I'm not joking", he's staring at me intensely and his tone is serious.

I try breathing normally but I'm failing. I can't stand this.

"Let me take you out for lunch, to thank you for yesterday and to apologize for being such an idiot"

"Okay", I breathe out without thinking.

           ****
He takes me to the Italian restaurant across the street. We sit outside. The breeze is refreshing.

It's quite nice to be outside, taking in the fresh air. The stench of cigarettes and alcohol can be very overwhelming.

"Thank you", I say to him.
"No. I'm thanking you, remember", he smiles.

Gosh he's so beautiful.

"I remember", I laugh slightly.

The waiter comes to our table and he gives us the menus. I order lasagna and he asks for the same. The waiter walk away and he comes back with two Aperol Spritz. We thank him and he leaves.

"How are you glowing like this after the rough night you've had?"
He shrugs.

"I don't know. Maybe it has something to do with you"

I mentally roll my eyes at him.
Here we go again.

"How old are you?", I ask him. I'm trying to avoid his flirting tactics.

"28", he says simply. I'm surprised when he doesn't ask me how old I am.

Call me paranoid but I think that's a bit suspicious.

"Wow", I've seen "older" 25 year olds.
"You must have gotten your parents best genes.", I compliment him.

He seems a bit uncomfortable. I guess that's a touchy subject. I hold my breath. I'm waiting for the angry outburst I normally receive from Sandile when I speak of his family.

Stop comparing them.
My subconscious scolds me.

"I'd know if only I knew them", As he speaks, I notice that he is in a state of tranquility. There's no sign of anger whatsoever.

I apologize nonetheless.

"It's not your fault", he lifts up my face and he caresses my cheeks.

The waiter brings our food and Keletso's hand leaves my cheek with a memory of what was.

Damn the waiter.

"So... You want to get a tattoo?", he asks.
"Yeah I do"
"Of what"
"A butterfly, a sunset and a sunflower"

"That's a lot. So why haven't you gotten it yet?"
"I'm not sure where I should put it"

"I can show you", he stares at me.

I'm at a loss of words. He smiles wryly. He's teasing me.

I focus on my plate. I eat without looking at him. His gaze makes me uncomfortable.

When we're done eating, he orders some Margaritas.

"No,no.no!"
"Yes!"
"No!!", I protest again.

"Come on. Stop being such a bore. Let's paint the town red", he pleads. "

"I can't, I have to get back to work"
"You want to know the secret behind the glow and the youth?"

I nod.

"The fountain of youth", he says.
"The fountain of youth?"

"Drinking margaritas and having fun. Ditch work. Have some fun and destress. You need to loosen up"

You do need it. You've been going through a lot. When was the last time you had some carefree fun?

My subconscious sides with him. Traitor!

"Okay fine", I have no choice, it's two against one.

Shots after shots. Party after Party. Club after club. The night goes on until the worries of my life are nothing but a distant memory at the back of my mind.

"What a life!!!", I scream as we're walking clumsily on the street.

I'm not really sure where we're going but I want to follow him wherever. When I'm with him, my problems feel as light as a feather. It might be the alcohol talking but it doesn't really matter.