Secrets & Love

Chapter 6: Joshua

After Ava left the table, a silent anger grew between me and my parents. How could she say that to her? About her? How could she bring up Emily like that? The thought angered me more, as I placed my hand over my right rib.

"You better go check on her," my fathers voice was calm, though I could feel the anger too, "don't worry about cleaning up."

I nodded, standing up from the table. I heard a small scowl from my mother, taking everything in me to not verbally attack her. How could she? I walked over to my room, knowing that Ava didn't have any clothes for tonight. I picked out an old pair of pants, and a plain t-shirt. Though I knew they would be too big, for she was barely half my size it seemed. I smiled at the thought, until walking across the hall to her room.

She laid on the bed, looking at the ceiling. She seemed barely there, lost in the world of her mind. Her hair came over her shoulders, hiding the bruises on her neck, markings that seemed to represent a hand. It pained to think that someone could do something like that to someone so, Ava. There are no words to describe her. She is so different, a good difference, I think.

I walked over, placing the clothes on the edge of the bed, then sitting beside her feet. I stared up to her eyes, she seemed to be following something with them. They seemed so lost and confused.

"Ava?" I said, taking her out of her head. She looked outside, as the sun had finished setting, then she looked at me. First of fear, then of comfort. "Are you alright?"

"Never better," she joked, laying back down.

"Can I-?" I wondered. I pointed beside as she lifted her head, balancing on her arms. She nodded, going back down.

"What was she talking about?" she asked, I dreaded answering the question.

"Huh?" I lied of confusion, turning over looking at her.

"Who can't I replace?" Another moment of silence passed, as I stayed quiet, "who is she?"

"My sister," my voice was different than usual, as the subject was painful.

"You have a sister?"

"Had a sister."

"Oh," she stayed silent for a moment, too silent, "was this her room?"

"You're so curious," I laughed, "why so many questions?"

"Why are there so many answers?" I laughed at her words for they made no sense.

"Yes, this was her room," I said calmly after I finished laughing, "you're quite similar you know? I bet you would have liked her."

"Really?" she sat up looking over at me. I looked up into her eyes, and saw that twinkle in her eye she always gets when I look at her. I smiled at it, as I knew it was a good sign.

"What's this?" she asked, picking it up. Always asking questions

"Some clothes for you to wear to bed," I said embarrass, though I don't know why, it didn't mean anything. Did it?

"Are these yours?" she asked, again another question, as looked over to me. My cheeks still flustered.

"Yes," I looked away, then back towards the clothes that she held in her hands, "just until we get you some of your own, I figured wearing scrubs to bed wouldn't be so comfortable."

She smiled, I saw a light pink sensation glow on her cheeks. She looked amazing. Even with the scars, and bruises.

"What are you smiling about?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing," she lied, throwing out a laugh. I know what she was smiling at, just as I know she's lying, for there's a look in her eyes, a sparkle and glow.

"Sure sure," I laughed with a tease, "I will let you change now, if you need anything, I'll be in my room." she nodded with a smile as she was still giggling, as I walked out the door.

I walked into my room, the air slightly cool from the open window. Though I threw off my shirt, and put on plaid pants for bed. They were different shades of blue, and striped black. Similar to the ones I allowed Ava to wear. I smiled at the memory of her reaction.

I laid down in bed, hearing the slight voices of my parents. Anger filled me from earlier, my mothers words repeated in my mind. Emily's words that haunt me, though I missed so much. Why her? Why not me? I shook off the thought.

Climbing up out of bed, pulling the punching bag out that hid in the closet. I wrapped my hands from a cotton blend wrap. A sense of relief left my hands as the force of the rough material reached my hand over and over. The more let out, the harder it hit. Letting out breath after breath, my body covered in sweat after every second, until the last breaking point. Dropping my body from exhaustion, unwrapping my hands that slightly trembled.

I grabbed a towel shortly after, applying it to my face and neck. The fighting had stopped echoing through the house, though a slight yell came in.

"Stop!" it said. Ava.

I ran over to her room, she squirmed in her place, repeating her words over and over.

"Ava!" I went over to her, she was still trapped in her state, "Ava!" I repeated, taking a hold of her, she seemed to move to be let free, though I brought her closer. "It's okay. You're okay. Ava you're okay," She allowed herself to relax as I brought her to my chest, laying on top of the sheets of her bed. Her body trembled violently. She was terrified. Though she laid in my arms, calming every passing minute. Who did this to her?

My father came to the door, with a slightly worried face as I still hung on to her. "Is she alright?" he asked, his voice filled with exhaustion. She had woken him up, who knew how my mom felt now.

"Trembling, but calming down," I answered, looking down before the girl in my arms, her breath matched mine, yet a little more shaky.

"Do you think it's from-.." my father did want to finish that sentence. I looked at him and nodded. My fathers eyes looked around the room

"Did mom wake up?" I asked, my father nodded. Oh boy.

"She is not too happy, but don't worry about your mom. You worry about her," he motioned to Ava.

"Mind if I stay in here tonight? She seems calmer with me here," I asked, looking back at her.

"Sure, just don't make it a habit," he laughed slightly, and walked out the door closing it behind him.

I stayed awake for a little bit longer, making sure she stays asleep. Makes me wonder what she dreams about. Were they like mine? Repeated every night? The thoughts kept coming, until looking down upon a peaceful sleep on her face, I smiled until finally drifting off.