Secrets & Love

Chapter 22: Avalon

WARNING!

SEXUAL CONTENT

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She found my journal. MY journal. The place where all the words that cant yet be said laid on a piece of paper. And his mother, of all people, found it. I felt violated. Why was she in my room in the first place? Taking my things. Searching through my things.

I panicked on the bathroom floor. Clinging to the robe against my chest. He read it. The paper in his hands. He read it. Out of all the people, he read it. God, anyone but him. I trusted him. Trusted. Now all that's good is gone. Now all I hear is his mumbling voice from behind the door, and the whole world is fading into a blur. In a way, this hurts more than a kick to the stomach. It hurts in a way that I cannot explain as the tears leave my eyes.

After what seems like forever has passed, I still sat in my robe and towel. The mumbles stopped from behind the door, while the tears stopped flowing from my swelling eyes. My body felt weak once again. Once again I'm forcing myself off the ground. Forcing myself like I once used to with my wounds, as I left myself off the bathroom floor to finally dress myself. Finally put on the oversized t-shirt and leggings from earlier. They held so loose on my forsaking body.

I opened the door slowly, peeking through a crack to see if the room was empty. A sense of relief came over when it was. The clock on the bedside table read 1:32 am, it had been hours since everything. The door to the room was slightly opened, opening to the cold, gloomy hallway. I notice a glass of an orange substance, beside it a white bottle. The glass was cool to the touch, the smell of sweet oranges filled my nose as I brought it up to my nose. The delicious smell of Josh's fathers homemade orange juice that I've come to love. Josh brought me some with the pain medicine, just like he said he would. More tears fell from my eyes while I placed the cup back down. I knew what I had to do.

***

As I walked down the empty streets, the lights gave off an orange state. The wind was cold passing through my coat, blowing my long hair around my face. The map on my phone showed the direction a few blocks away. It was 3 am by now, my legs starting to throb from the walk.

My bag hung loose against my shoulders, packed to the brim of what I could carry. Clothes, femaleproducts, hygiene products, with a few books as well. I left without a trace, no note, nothing. The bed was made, no clothes laid on the floor, it was as if I was never even there. Now as I walk down this road, alone in the dark, I walk away from what I thought was a perfect life. A perfect guy. Perfect father. But I guess I should know by now, there's no such thing as perfect. There's no perfect guy, no perfect life. No perfect.

The wind blows harder, stinging my cheeks from the spring cold. The houses all have their lights off, as all the members lay warm in their beds, asleep, not throbbing in the cold during the middle of the night. When 3 am turns into 4 am, the blocks nears closer.

The moon hangs high in the middle sky with the stars. Though here in the city, the stars are not as visible as they were in the forest. There in the middle of nowhere, the stars were my favorite thing, the only thing that kept me alive. That kept me sane in that old rotten house that smelt of cigarettes, and beer.

As I walk up to the front steps of the final destination, I come across a large white door with golden aspects. The siding panels are almost the same shade as Josh's house. The same colors, with a similar shape from a place I've come so familiar to me these past weeks.

The bell rings through the house, I listen as it echoes through the open area. After a few minutes with no answer, I rang it once again, listening to the lingering sound. This time the light turns on, with the sound of the door unlocking. An average sized male, with fluffy light brown hair, and a chiseled jaw with a slow grown stubble. His sleepy deep blue eyes look confused as he stares at a small girl, with red swollen eyes freezing out in the cold, while he stood there in only a pair of sweats, showing off his tamed body.