The Fragility of Fate ✔️

23 | Confessional

Gabriel

We'd had a good evening at the Saining Ceremony, and I was glad that Miesha got to witness the warmth and welcome from the rest of the pack. I knew she'd had this notion that she wouldn't be accepted by others, but even if there were any swirls of dissension they were irrelevant to me anyway. But there wasn't.

I had been cautious not to be joined at the hip the entire night. I wasn't her keeper. My only expectation was that she let go enough to enjoy herself. That said, the evening was stained by the Eliza situation... I'd made a cock up for sure. I should have warned her given she'd sense it the second she saw her. But Christ. In all fairness I had cut all ties with Eliza the second I found Miesha. We hadn't fucked since the night before we raided the Shadow Moon Pack... surely that granted me some reprieve. Gripping the steering wheel a little tighter, her silence filled me with the guilt I didn't actually think I was required to feel... did I?

As we winded through the road, I couldn't stop my mind from going there. I knew that Jacob and her had been intimate. The fact it was my brother made it harder to process, but not impossible. Did he steal her virginity? Did that have to be a prerequisite for my acceptance of the fact? No. I came to that realization a long time ago. We are fallible beings... I knew she believed that he was her mate and I couldn't hold it over her head or we'd be fucked from the start. What was worse was that I was fucking Eliza for months knowing that despite a pull towards her, she was not my mate. I was the one who desecrated our bond, but I never saw that in my actions at the time. I guess hindsight does serve a purpose. I was the one in the wrong in this regard, that I could admit.

Pulling into the driveway, Miesha stepped out of the car before staring at the moon in reverence.

"Do you want to shift?"

"Not tonight... do you?"

"I'm fine."

Turning to me, we walked up the stairs and inside. I was filled with this urgency to just end the evening as a confessional. I couldn't help it. I was sick of the untold words between us and even if I fucked things by being honest, I had to do it. I had to know. And I had to explain.

"Miesha. We need to talk."

Her nervousness gnawed at my heart. I have made a mistake.

Apathy was evident in her tone, "If you want..."

Heading into the lounge room, I lit the fireplace before handing her a throw rug as she pulled her legs to her chest in the corner of the sofa.

"I feel like I owe you an explanation Miesha...."

She looked up at me, waiting for me to continue.

"I didn't ever expect to find my other half Miesha. I didn't expect that I would find you." I felt a lump in my throat as I struggled to find the words to convey what I wanted to. "Eliza... I can't call her a mistake... It was my mistake. I made a choice at the time, despite knowing she wasn't my mate. We were seeing each other for a couple of years, but we both understood that was all it was..."

Miesha nodded, fiddling with the threads of fabric on her blanket as she often did when she was deep in thought. Contemplation.

"I swear to you it ended the fucking second I found you Miesha. I didn't realize at the time the impact my actions would have on you or on me because I had nothing to compare it to... I didn't understand the full weight of the mate bond, and the pull until I met you..."

"Gabriel, you don't owe me an apology. Yes... it hurt. Because it is natural to feel jealous when you picture your mate with someone else..." She paused before looking up at me, "I know you have felt the same because of Jacob, and he is your fucking brother no less... it has been eating me alive and I am sick of feeling filthy."
I could see pain in her eyes, "Miesha. You thought he was your mate, that is the difference. I knew Eliza wasn't."

"I did think that... When I first met Jacob, there was a pull. I know now it wasn't the same thing, obviously... He was very clear he was my mate, and I was so stupid to believe him." Furrowing her brows, she wiped a tear from her cheek before continuing, "I gave myself willingly to him Gabriel, I can never take that back. You already know what happened afterwards but at the start... at the start he was charming, he played the role well until he had me... And it became clear pretty fucking quickly that it was all a fucking lie."

I stood from where I was and sat next to her, "Come here..." Pulling her across my lap, I stroked her hair as she stared up at the ceiling, "It wasn't your fault.... It changes nothing."

"But that doesn't change how I feel though Gabriel..."

"No. But in time... In time, I hope you let me give you what you deserve... those feelings will be replaced, that is a promise Miesha."

As she laid in my lap, I continued to weave my hands through her hair, feeling each strand cascade through my fingers like a waterfall. Sitting in our solitude of secrets shared, I felt like an enormous weight had been lifted.

Resting my head back, I closed my eyes as I continued to hold her against me. The soft hum of her breathing soothed me as we both drifted off, spinning slowly into a free fall as we were released from the pain of the past.

Thank you for reading.

Don't forget to vote and comment if you are enjoying my story.

Stone Sour is my greatest muse for my writing, who inspires you?