The Fragility of Fate ✔️

33 | Lost

"We are all, in a sense, lost. Life is about continuously rediscovering ourselves and making the conscious choice not to hide from the hard emotions. It's the ones who've realized they are lost who will find their way."

- Lindsey Sterling

~

Miesha

"I don't begrudge you for defending her Miesha, your capacity to always see the best in others is one of your most endearing traits."

Her warm smile reached her eyes, each word bringing me the reassurance I was seeking.

Slumping back against the wooden chair, I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. I was glad I took the opportunity to visit her at the cabin she shared with Neve.

Resting on the outskirts of the territory, the trip allowed for a subtle, yet distinct change in scenery. I noticed from the angle where I sat that the sunlight was able to peer through the wefts of fleece that embellished the sky, casting shadows that danced on the wooden table before me.

And how if I looked out to the left through the open doorway that medleys of fireweed blossoms and other native flowers adorned the landscape like jewellery. This place, her home, fit her in every sense of the word.

Infusing the hot water with dried chamomile leaves, Adrienne brought over the pot before gently placing down two china teacups between us. I imagined the cups were sentimental to her, given the gentleness of their placement on the table and the way her features softened in reverie as she did so.

This pack was so lucky to have her as their healer. Her softness was part of her beauty. The way her eyes followed the direction of the breeze as it danced feather light along the tall grass showed she was at one with nature. It was as if she had been spun into the very fabric of it, the land all the more beautiful because she was in it.

And being in her company after what felt like prolonged absence was something I revered, as it had always been exactly what I needed to regain a sense of composure.

"Adrienne... It's just that with everything that happened, I can understand how Eliza would comply with any demand from him if it meant it would appease him."

Leaning over her table to open the window further, I helped her pull the curtain back to let in the breeze, careful not to knock the wildflowers from their vase as I did so.

"So Gabriel acknowledged she has been betraying the pack, but fell short of confirming whether Jacob forced her or if she was willingly conspiring with him?"

Sitting back down to fiddle with a strand of my hair, I shared my musings out loud, "Yes, he mind-linked me about fifteen minutes ago to confirm he confronted her. Despite her claims otherwise, he believes her to be conspiring with Jacob and has banished her from the pack."

"So where is she now, has she left yet?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "She is probably bolting for the hills now is my first guess but I don't actually know. He did tell me that he was sending James to make sure she was leaving and asked Neve to come back here. He asked that I should wait with you until she does."

Adrienne didn't respond, but I didn't need her to. I just needed someone to talk to.

I knew my visit to Adrienne was more than seeking validation. I was seeking solace in my first friend since coming to Cross Rivers. I was seeking sanctuary, because I realized that with Jacob's imminent arrival, I didn't want to be alone.

Despite taking on the Rogues when Gabriel went to Sandstone, I was filled with a sudden trepidation. I didn't want to see Jacob again. As much as I knew this day would come, I just wasn't ready. Even my wolf seemed unsettled, which brought me further anxiety. Her renewed strength was something that I had relied on and almost taken for granted since I'd been here, but the prospect of facing Jacob sent her back to her enclave and I felt alone.

I didn't bother hiding my apprehension from Adrienne. She had seen me at my worst and I knew I could trust her. I guess what I really wanted to know what was what we would be facing.

I placed the cup down on its saucer, edging each word out as if I were scared of the answer, "When he comes, and it will be soon, do we have what it takes to defeat him?"

Carefully pressing down the corner of the laced tablecloth, she mulled over her reply before letting it out.

"I think what you are really asking is if you have what it takes to defeat him..." Gauging my reaction, she paused before continuing, "You have everything you need already here... within you." Placing her hand on my heart I felt my eyes begin to well at her gesture as I struggled to swallow down my emotions.

Placing my hand on top of hers I smiled softly at the kindness in her actions. But the tremble in my voice still gave away my self-doubt as I shared the question that still lingered within me. "But what if I'm not strong enough?"

"It is only you who can answer that Miesha. You must trust yourself and trust in your wolf. There is no greater strength a female can have than to believe in herself."

I knew had I been asked the same thing, I would have offered the same advice. But being on the receiving end made it more difficult to hear.

"Why does it have to be my fate to be chained to him? He is impossible to kill... impossible."

Placing her hand under my chin, she lifted my stare from the floor to ensure I would heed her words, her eyes boring into mine.

"There is a reason why he continues to get away with so much. It is not because he is impossible to kill- he is not. It is not because it is your fate to be chained to him either. It is because it is your fate to defeat him, therein lies the difference."

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