I'm ready to be on my own. Set my own goals. No longer worry
12/17/2023
Queen
I think I'm content in my own space and grace and tent
A small campfire
keeping me warm.
Im reminded every rose has its thorns so I'll pluck off the berries
from a curious bush
and I'll use them to paint a picture of how my life should look.
The blues and the reds
Crown upon my head
Reminding others to stay away if unworthy For I will not be persuaded
When I have my palace to protect
I will not be misguided
in the people I elect
To stand by me in trying times
A dinner worth more than a fine
And if you do decline
No matter I rejoice in my free time
Off on my own living my best life
Not reliant on a stranger when I have knights by my side. To slay the intruders of neighboring men
If you think I'm settling
Now you must think again
I will not be won over
With roses or dinner
I will not be won over
By a low life sinner
So let me tell you something if you want to be a winner
Fight like you have a prize to win
Otherwise you don't approach me
Waste my time
I won't let you in.
Now guards
Seize him.
————————————————————————
12/19/2023 2:59am
Plan 🐝
Pointless hormones
Lack of education
I flood my body
High hesitation
Mass anxiety
Side effects
Which is worse
I get what I get.
A drunken night
Leaves a fright
I need to say no
I say let go
Let go
I can't
I'm scared
Stirring
Awake in the night
An owl so heavy, drowned
Without flight
Might need a crutch
I feel a panic attack
Strict parents know all
How can I say none at alls
Small wild little mistakes
I hope I am ok. December decisions repeating this year
December decisions I'm scheming this year
Scheming on how I will run away this time
Run
I hope I don't have to
I hope I am delirious
I hope I am right in that there's no worries needed
No thoughts were headed
I'm no doctor
My best friends no help
I need a hype man right now
Not a worried ninjas stealth
Willing to help
But I'm in the wrong.
How can I pay this off
I'm probably.
This is just my anxiety
I have nothing to fear
Fears implanted into my brain for years and for years
Audiobook and twitching eyes
Poetry in hand as I write down white lies tries I know I'm right in that I'm overthinking. Distractions are helping this insomniacs kitchen
Stirring up pies
Stirring up chemicals
Destroying from the inside out
At least I'll be able to splay out on the couch
Ouch ready for your drill
My anxiety's been edgy but life's given me no will
To leave behind for if I'm done
I'm worried for a future that hasn't yet come
Which worry should I worry about
Which idea struggles with little to no doubt
Come out under influence
Spill all the tea
Or struggle internally with the broken parts of me.
Why can't I learn from me
Guess that's why the hard way
is what I could see
I know it's a mirage
But I'm
Scared.
I'm scared
I'm
Scared.
YOU ARE READING
Sophomore soliloquies
PoetryIf you've ever felt burdened by being a sophomore in college your not alone. I'm writing these and posting them as I go along. So we can feel less alone together, in a complicated world, within a song. Please feel free to comment, critique, or ask...
