Chapter 29: Then Go

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by hsdiaries

by hsdiaries

Over the next few days, I tried. I got up, I showered. I sat at the table for all the meals we had. I tried to have conversations. I went back to work. I tried.

Harry tried too. To kiss me. To hold me. To be near me like before, but I would freeze. I would wince. I hated it.

I was at work finishing up the clean up of our main acts dressing room when a soft knock came at the open door. I turned to see Charles, and smiled softly, "Hey, come in."

He walked over and leaned on the snack cabinet I was organizing, "I haven't talked to you in a while. You always move so quickly when you see me."

"I know," I took a deep breath, "I'm sorry."

"Come here." He said walking over to the couch, and I followed sitting next to him.

"Talk to me Mags." He said softly.

I sat there quietly, so many things had gone through my head for a while now. So many things I had kept to myself, unsure of how to deal with any of it.

"I need to get away Charlie. From everything, but I can't, because I have Becca." I bit my lip, as tears started falling, "But I'm going insane. I need a break."

"Maggie, you know I basically helped raise Rebecca. All you have to do is ask, and I will watch her. I will always be that support for you with her. I promised you that a long time ago."

I nodded and chewed on my lip, "And then Harry...I'm hurting him. But I can't Charles, I can't bring myself to be with him how I was. It's just been, a lot. So much in a span of 7 months. Or more. I don't know anymore I've lost count. I just need to sort my mind. I can't do that here. Or with him. Or with anyone. I feel like I'm suffocating."

I felt myself start to really cry and Charles pulled me in, hugging my tightly, "Then go Maggie. Just know, it's going to hurt Harry. A lot. It's tough, because, this is something that should be dealt with as a team. But if you don't think that's the answer right now, then go. You have more sick hours than anyone I know, even with the amount of work you've missed. Go."

I nodded softly in his arms, and took a deep breath, "Love you always Charlie."

"Love you too Mags."