Young, Wild and Married

Chapter 48-A Cold Night

Bring Me The Night - Sam Tsui ft. Kina Grannis

(You guys should totally listen to that song <3) 

unedited.

Chapter 48—A Cold Night

When I woke up, an hour or two after that guy showed up, it was already a bit dark. The lights inside my room weren't turned on and the light from the outside wasn't that bright. I sat up and took a deep breath. As much as I didn't want to ponder about what had happened, I can't help but regret how I pushed Andrew away.

Before a tear fell from my eye, I stood up and walked towards the corner of my room. There, I found a box that I promised to myself I wouldn't open until I haven't moved on completely. But I knew that was just too impossible.

I started opening the box as I sat on the floor. I quickly pulled out his T-shirt. It was the T-shirt I took from our house when I found him drunk a week ago. I brought it up to my face, inhaling the faint scent he has on his T-shirt. God, how I missed him so much.

I didn't realise I was already crying until I felt a part of his tee to be slightly damped. Why did I have to be such a fool? Why did I have to push him away? Why did I think leaving him will be the best for us? Simply because I was stupid.

I took out one of our wedding photos out of the box. It was framed. I can't help but smile as I look at our photo. His left hand was wrapped around my waist and I was slightly leaning on him. My smile then looked a little bit force and annoyed. I remembered how I wanted the photographers to stop taking photos of us. I could also recall the genuine smile on his face that day. It was like he wasn't forced to marry me. But then, he really wasn't.

I stared at his face on the photo. His smile was wide and authentic. His gorgeous blue eyes were so happy. Why hadn't I realised this before? Why hadn't I realised that he had been in love with me all this time? Why hadn't I realised that I was in love with him too? Yes, I did but it was a bit late.

How many times had I pushed him away? Thinking about it, how many times had I broken him? I thought all this time I was being selfless. I thought I had been doing the right thing. I was wrong. All this time I had been so selfish. I had been hurting him countless of times. Yet, I never heard him complaining about it.

I have married the most amazing man but I wanted to let him go. I didn't even bother asking him if he wanted me to let him go because I was selfish and stupid. Now, there was no point on pushing him away. There was no point on forcing him to be with Tiffany or with his baby because it wasn't his baby and his real baby died. We both lost our baby. Again, I was being selfish. I kept on thinking about myself.

"I'm sorry," I whispered as I ran my finger on his picture. Using my free hand, I dried the tears that were on my cheek. "I'm sorry."

I should stop pushing him away. I need to have him back. I want him back. I will have him back. I just hope he wants me back.

I sat there on the floor in silence as my back leans on the cold wall of my room. I glanced at my closed window and I could see that there were now snowflakes falling from the sky. I smiled bitterly trying not to reminisce.

"Cristina, please." I heard a faint voice coming from outside. My eyes grew wide knowing who owned that voice.

"Andrew, please understand," I heard my mom say making me be alert. "Christie, she's...she's...she needs some rest."

"I just need to talk to her, please," I heard him plead as I walked closer to my window. There were a few snowflakes on his jacket and his black hair. Obviously, he wasn't listening to weather reports because his jacket wasn't thick enough. His hands were inside his pocket but he was obviously feeling cold. "Please."