[p o e t r y]

Ridiculous Naivety

Freshman year,
I was teased for being ridiculous and naïve
I felt as though
I needed boys to defend my name
To help me to feel safe, protected, and secure
I had two friends who did that for me
They were my lights
And my protectors
In a sea of students
Who I felt judged and belittled me

To be honest,
Now, halfway through Junior Year,
Everything has changed
And somehow nothing has changed

In a way, nothing has changed,
I still am a bit ridiculous and naive
I often don't know things
And regularly someone
Will have to explain something
Dark or dirty
To me
I still hold
The "good girl" card
In my back pocket,
Like an ID,
Waiting to be whipped out
At the scene of a wreck

Yet, at the same time; everything has changed,
Nowadays, I am confident in my silliness
And I believe that my naivety is a good thing.

Freshman year
I felt as though I needed to boys to protect me
From the teasing,
And though I am grateful
For the boys who did,
I am ever so grateful
That I no longer need them
To feel secure

Lately, I wear my innocence as a mark of pride I'm proud of who I am
I'm proud of the purity
That my ridiculousness carries.
I no longer need boys to stick up for me
I can stick up for myself

I cannot be belittled
For the little I know
For I am proud to say
That the things I know
I do not wish to dwell on
And the things I don't know
I don't particularly care to learn

I don't judge those who care to know
Nor those who have known
For far longer than I,
I simply respect them
And pray they respect me,
But even if they don't,
I respect me.

01/23/23