sunsets after dark. | poetry collection

206. - 210.

206.
I still listened to songs that made me think of you while I was trying to get over you.
Or when an image came up on my phone and it made me think of you. I would play a scenario in my head as if I showed you.
I played scenarios where we were back to how we used to be.
Where we were much better then how we are now.
What we could've been.
As the songs play and I scroll past the image.
I can't help up think of how we ended.
But I knew I couldn't change anything about it.
~E, I don't have superpowers.

207.
My weekends will start to pass as if we never talked.
They will go quiet as I lay in my head imagining scenarios where I was in love and it was pure.
The smiles, laughs, and the dates.
It may seem lonely and uncomfortable at first.
Not being able to hear your voice or imagine scenarios where you were mine.
But I will learn to love it.
Because I deserve to love someone else who loves me and always will love me.
And only me.
~E, not giving myself time to heal.

208.
you don't want me.
but you don't want anyone else to have me.
~E, make up your mind.

209.
I want someone to know everything I've done wrong, all my bad choices, everything I shouldn't have done and still choose to love me.

210.
I couldn't understand why I couldn't get over him.
I couldn't fathom as to why I couldn't.
Physically I was done.
Mentally my soul was still holding on.
As everyday the length between us grew.
Even with all the staring.
From afar to up close.
Even after he's broken my heart into a thousand pieces and expect me to be able to pick it up and piece it back together all on my own.
I still cannot get over him.
To a point where I was just spec in the air to him.
One that lingered far too long.
For the possibility that he'll change,
and choose me.
~E, still holding onto that possibility.