Chapter 29: I Don't Know What To Say

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   I walked into class and immediately locked eyes with Miss Grande. She smiled at me, but I could only halfheartedly smile back before dropping eye contact and making my way to my seat.

   I was aware of how strange my behavior was, but I didn't know when to tell her about Trent. I wasn't sure if I was going to bring up the whole thing about him knowing, but not telling her felt like lying. Honestly, the thought was overwhelming me.

   I stayed on my phone, not realizing the bell had rang, and asked Camila and Selena how their day had gone yesterday. I had fallen asleep last night before getting a chance to say anything to them.

   "Miss Y/L/N!"

   I looked up to see Ariana staring at me. She looked pissed!

   She nodded her head towards her desk, giving me the signal to put my phone on it before she had to take it and turn it into the office. "Stay after class," she added.

   I nodded as I made my way to her desk, my phone in hand.

  "As I was saying..."

   I tuned out. My thoughts were running rampant at this point, making me way more anxious about the situation than I should be.

I tuned back in, realizing how disrespectful I was being by disrupting Ariana's class and then tuning her out, not just as her student but as her whatever-I-am-now.

I wrote down a few notes until class ended. I packed up slower than everybody else so that I wouldn't be awkwardly standing there waiting for them all to leave.

She shut the door behind the last student just as I zipped up my backpack.

"I'm sorry," I immediately said.

She gave me a look that said 'oh really?' all sarcasm implied.

   "I was so zoned out in your class, and I didn't mean any offense by it. I don't want you to think I'm taking advantage of our... this thing," I gestured between the two of us. "I just have a lot on my mind currently. I'm sorry if it came off as disrespectful in any way."

   She smiled and brought me into a hug before placing a quick peck to my lips. I savored it, knowing it might be my last for a while. "Thank you," she pulled away and smiled.

"I have something I need to tell you, and it's very important. I want you to hear it from me first."

She nodded and walked over to her desk.

"I'm dating Trent," I word vomited.

She gave a look that held hurt and confusion along with something I couldn't quite decipher, but I jumped in again before she could get anything out.

"Not like dating dating, you know...? Like we are talking, but we aren't actually talking. We want everybody to know we like each other."

In my pause, she leaned back and crossed her arms. You're making this worse just say what you mean!

"Okay. We are together, but we aren't really together. He wants girls to leave him alone, so I am being his fake girlfriend. We have to be touchy and loud about it, so everybody will buy it. I know what you're probably thinking: it's dumb of me to agree to a fake relationship when I don't get anything out of it. Hear me out though. If people think that I'm with him, we don't have to worry about them thinking we are together."

A smiled returned to her face.

"So you're okay with it?" I asked.

"It's a ridiculous idea." I frowned slightly. "But it's a good enough cover," she said with a smile, her dimples popping out.

I felt proud that she agreed to go along with my idea.

I really didn't want to tell her that Trent knew and scare her off when I just got her, but I knew that she deserved to know.

"There's something else..."

"And what might that be?" she asked flirtatiously.

"Umm, he knows about us."

Her smile dropped drastically.

"I didn't tell him! He saw us kiss at practice the other day. We came up with the idea and he walked me to practice but came back to drop off his hoodie for me to wear. He must have walked in or something."

She sighed heavily and shook her head.

"He promised not to tell. We agreed that we were better as friends, and he said that he just wants to see me happy. We talked about it at breakfast this morning. I know he seems like every other immature boy in this school, but we can trust him."

I was doing my best to attempt to convince her, but I wasn't sure if any of it was working.

She interlaced her fingers together on her desk and kept her gaze on them. "I don't know what to say." Whether it was intentional or not, it was a power move and made me feel small and insecure.

"You don't have to say anything. I was scared to tell you because I didn't want either of us to push the other away, but you deserved to know."

"Thank you, for telling me."

I gave a sad smile and a single nod. "I should go, give you time to process everything... Uh, can I get a pass?"

She didn't say anything but instead just grabbed a sticky note and a pen before scribbling something down and giving it to me, allowing me to make it out of her door without another word.

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