The Devilman's Flower (+16)

XXXVI- I could never leave you, Cassia Florin

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"So it's either brown or... What was the other college's name?" I rubbed my face at the desk I've been sitting in for so long. My parents had been talking about college none stop and I've been so stressed.

So drained...

I pushed my chair back and went to the kitchen to get some water. "Cassia!" I rushed back inside and sat down on my seat again. "This is about you, we're not obligated to do everything for you." I had the biggest urge to roll my eyes but my patience and sense of logic held me back.

That's all I want. To get away from them. For them to stop deciding for me.

Today was the day before graduation and I had school.

Kylie was so silent towards me and I feel like it's the silence before the storm.

After I let Luca tell her off on the phone he told me to tell her that I didn't know about him answering the phone but I honestly don't care about it.

My mother made her way inside my room as I got my school bag.

I thought she would hug me and be here for me because I'm graduating but no. I always expect too much.

"No more hanging out with that guy, Cassia. You saw your father but you truly don't know how bad I can get. Kylie told me about him keep picking you up and you know we don't let you sleep over at anyone's place ever. Don't test me." She pointed a finger directed at my chest and it burned my eyes.

I shouldn't have done makeup today.

"If Kylie gets to do whatever she wants then why can't I. I'm eighteen, I'll do whatever I want to as well. I know how bad you can get, I watched you fail at motherhood." I thought I expected the worse by thinking she'll yell but I knew I should've just kept my mouth shut when my head jerked to the side.

I wasn't expecting her to actually slap me across the face but it wasn't anything new from her.

I grabbed my bag and ran downstairs, completely forgetting where my phone is.

I walked past the driver who had been waiting for me to drive me to school.

I fucking hate them so much.

I hate my father for breaking my heart before no other man could.

I hate my mother for watching it happen and adding to it.

I don't want to live like this anymore.

I threw my bag down as I sat down on the sidewalk with my head in between my knees. I pushed my hair back aggressively, pulling on my scalp. I hate everyone so much. I felt my bottom lip tremble as a tear escaped my eye.

I'm so scared that I won't be able to escape from them.

I'm so scared they're going to trap me all my life and I'll have to go to college, get a job, and get married to another man because of my father's benefits.

I was breathing heavily with the panic built up in my chest. It's almost as if it was the darkness that consumed me.

But it wasn't the kind of darkness I liked.

This darkness crept inside of me, making me hate myself for never being good enough for anyone. Making me hate myself for nobody ever loving me and wanting to leave me with the first chance they got. I got good grades for what? It's never enough for them. Never stayed out of their word for what? All they want to do is imprison me.

Nobody truly cares.

Luca will leave when he sees how pathetic I truly am.

Still think he'll like you when he sees you all breathless on the sidewalk, Cassia?