Love is Suicidal [Completed]

chapter: forty four

Shutting the car off in her driveway made my nerves worse than they already were. I was trying to keep my breathing under control, knowing that I came over here for a reason.

After I took the key out, I unbuckled my seat belt then tried figuring out how to get out of it before realizing it was like a rollercoaster seat belt.

I managed to get out then closed the door before locking it. I looked at the car then smiled before looking towards the house and feeling my heart start hammering in my chest.

Walking up the driveway, I tried thinking of what I was actually doing here. I knew that I wanted to see her and now that I knew things about her, I could use that to my advantage.

Hopefully this doesn't take an unsuspecting turn.

God help me.

I knocked on the door and stood there for a moment as I was looking around. It was in the afternoon but it was only five, so the sun wasn't setting yet but everything looked beautiful as always.

I thought back to the last time I saw River and she told me to leave as she yelled in my face. I tried talking to her but of course that didn't work so maybe it'll change this time.

Making an idiot out of myself like always when it comes to her.

After a few moments, I didn't hear anything coming from inside the house and River didn't open the door. I turned to see her car in the driveway and made sure that it was actually there.

I knocked again then figured that if she didn't answer this time, I might as well leave.

But after another moment, I heard the door unlock and open to reveal Belle standing there. I saw her smirk a little before running her hand through her hair, looking me up and down before walking past me.

That's then I turned to watch her walk to her car that that parked in front of the house on the street, that I completely missed.

It didn't take an idiot to figure out what they were doing and why Belle was even here.

I turn back to see River standing there with her arms crossed. "What are you doing here?"

"I honestly don't know. Sorry." I turn back and walk towards my car as Belle was already leaving.

My mind was telling me to leave but my heart was screaming to stay. I didn't know what to do as I unlocked the car door then turned towards the house and saw that River was no longer outside.

This is stupid.

This may be the dumbest shit I've ever done.

Chasing after a woman that doesn't want me and continuing to put myself in situations that consume my soul and everything else.

It's draining me to the point where it's hurting.

"Fuck it." I shut the car door and walked back towards the house. "No more running off." I said to myself as I stood in front of the door and knocked.

After a few moments, I heard noises from the other side and the door opened with River standing there. I saw the expression she had, which was the same one I've seen many times when I first met her.

"What?"

"I want to talk."

She looks at me for a moment. "Why?"

I rubbed my forehead as I looked at her. "I-"

"Listen, Jesse. I won't tell you again to leave me alone. I'm serious. You need to go."