3. Taehyung

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I freaked out. It was so friendly, that entire time when Jungkook was in my garage. For as long as I wasn't aware of it, just enjoying the moment, I was fine. And then I became aware of the fact that we were being friendly, that he wasn't leaving, that I was talking, and I didn't know how to put my hands into this anymore.

I panicked, restoring to being cold and mean, and we haven't talked ever since. Even when he picked up the car the next day, we exchanged no more than ten words. He paid before I could say it wasn't necessary and left. That makes it a week, and now I'm about to see him again at the race. I don't want to have to explain to him that the idea of being on good terms with him terrifies me as much as I want it, so I hope he's already forgotten.

Because the truth is, I don't know how to be friends with him. Maybe it wasn't him that I hated, and I don't blame him for my family situation, but we're still worlds apart. It's miraculous he's never just... left. He could have simply quit whatever we had going on, and he didn't. Rivalry, neutral ground, possible friendship. Whatever it is, he's around. And I'm not sure if I've ever thought I deserved that.

I arrive at the warehouses' parking lot in the freshly washed Mustang, for the first time showing off the car. I'm not worried about the race. I did, however, spend some time thinking about... everything else. Every season before, I used to be a rude asshole. I didn't have the mental capacity to care about it then.

It's been different ever since I left Seoul.

I was trying my best to be friendly with people I met while racing in different cities. I didn't want anyone to remember me as some piece of shit with incredible racing skills. It's no longer enough for me for people to think of me as the best racer and avoid me in every other occasion.

It's not like I'm trying to become friends with anyone here, or like I care that much what they think about me, but... neutrality and acceptance would be enough. Basic respect for fellow racers. That's when it comes to people whose faces I recognize. The situation is totally different when it comes to someone I've interacted with every single day of my life. Fighting, yes, but interacted nevertheless.

I'm surprised to see less people going into the race this season. Six. I thought people would be more interested because of the Japan Race. Besides me, Jungkook and Yeeun, there is Sana, Lee and Yugyeom. Sana is the only competition I consider. Yugyeom is mediocre and Lee is a first-place-racer-wannabe with no skills in particular. And he's a coward. That's why he always runs his mouth and never wins.

The race is exactly what I expect it to be. Me and Jungkook fighting for first place. For the first time I allow myself to think of it as fun. That's what racing Jungkook has always been – fun. Because we're basically at the same level, I can enjoy a good race against him. Running on adrenaline, not knowing who the winner will be at the end.

This time, he wins. And I'm absolutely alright with that. I'm so fucking fine with it. I smile to myself when I cross the finishing line behind him. Something those three months away gave me that I cherish the most is being okay with losing a race. Being okay with losing against Jungkook. Because I've always loved racing more than the place I'd end up with.

When I thought I hated Jungkook, it wasn't even a question. I had to win. Now, when I know he's never been the problem, I could probably even come in last and I'd be just as fine.

For more peace of mind, when I get out of my car, he smiles at me.

I smile back, my body relaxing. "Good job."

He shrugs, pretending like he's not proud of that race. "It's the car."

I chuckle. We both know it doesn't matter what car he'd car in, he'd still win.

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