Black Clover Oneshots and Scenarios

[Up His @ss 3] Nozel Silva CRACK

Yuh <3

Part thREE oF the uP hIS @ss crackseries.

Reader POV

Drinking and me? That's bad.

Even worse than Charlottle.

Hence why Nozel never let me go drinking.

But I didn't care.

"Pass me another," I said sluggishly to Jack who did so.

"Damn. I like women who can hold their liquor," Yami commented.

And just to piss Nozel off, I walked (dragged) myself over to him, putting my head on his shoulder. "And I like strong guys, but you don't see me sayin' shit"

"(y/n) what the hell are you doing near that smelly forgeiner?" Nozel looked furious.

"Oh shit, didn't you get railed the other day?" Dorthy giggled.

I sent her a peace-sign and jumped onto the counter, putting my legs on Yami's lap. "Yami, did anyone tell you you're just built different?"

"Huh?"

"Isn't that right, Charlotte? I bet he's packing ;)"

The blonde glared at me as her face got more and more red.

"I'm pretty sure he's got a small pickle," Jack said.

Yami threw his drink at the other captain. "Wanna bet?"

"Do it pussy."

Yami stood up after making sure my legs wouldn't bang against his metal chair. "Alright, assface."

"OI!" Mereleona's aura got darker. "Put your dicks away. Not that we can see shit anyway. But there's a minor!"

"I-" Rill tried to speak.

"Hush, child." Mereleona smirked at the guys who were getting pissed off. "But if anyone in this room dare claims to have a bigger pecker than I, please kindly step forward."

Not a single man did.

Hell, Fuegeleon was nervous!

"Mer, why would we deny you?" I snickered. "You're spitting facts."

She fistbumped me, chugging my drink and not caring I was just drinking it. "Exactly. You learn quick, Silva. Unlike your peabrain husband."

"WAIT!" Dorthy conjured up a stage and speakers. "HEY! Let's do some karaoke!"

I leaned on Mereleona and grabbed the mic. "Ladies and gentlemen, I got the medicine, so you should keep your eyes on the ball."

"Wrong universe," Dorthy giggled.

William Vangeance placed his cup down. "Lady (y/n), I don't think you should be singing right now."

"Agreed! Nozel, do something!"

But Nozel knew not to bother me.

"Nope. Last time I tried to get her to stop, she cut my braid off. Thankfully I had someone with hair magic fix her mistake."

"OH! So that's the origins!" Rill shuddered. "I think I'm going to go now."

"Don't you dare." I blocked off the entrance with ice. "Nope. We're rappin' for Jesus in here."

"She's mad,"

"Don't worry, I cringe myself out <3" I winked at Nozel. "And you love me."

"I won't disagree."

And yes, we actually sang Rapping for Jesus.

The bartender actually recorded it, making sure to include in the credits that it was Trio a la Noche featuring Mereleona.

Originally, Dorthy, Charlotte, and I were in a group for fun in our youth.

We would sing random things at bars and even considered debuting.

However, life got to us and we had to push that behind us.

That's how Nozel and I met.

He was tasked with bringing me home one night and he was so irritated.

But neither of us cared after the fifth time since I did have good conversations with him.

The next morning, I destroyed the single copy of the CD, my hangover so bad.

"You look stupid while crawling on the floor," Nozel smirked down at me as he put on a robe and picked me up.

"Piss off, asshole."

"Yet you-"

"Do NOT finish that sentance." I spat. "Fuck outta here, I'm doin' hot girl shit."

He watched me with amusement but helped me to the bathroom so I could get the aftermath of my hangover out of my body.

However, Dorthy kept the other copy of the soundtrack and was blasting it when I came to deliver a package to her squad a week later.

"We should get the gang back together!" She squealed. "And-"

"Nope." I shook my head. "Sorry, but I'm not allowed to leave Nozel's sight."

"Why?'

I patted my stomach, grinning. "The man was insistant on starting a family, so here we are."

"Oh." She shrugged. "WAIT! MY GIRL GOT LAID!"

"YOU SAY IT AS IF I HADN'T TAKEN HER BEFORE!" Nozel shouted from a distance.

We both turned to him and flipped him off.

"Piss off before I shove your braid up your ass!"

Needless to say, the coral peacocks were all concerned about my marriage to the elder Silva.

__________________________

Story time!!! So I showed Rappin' For Jesus (clean version) to my church leader and she looked at me with disappointment. Funny shit.