Fighting for love

Chapter 59

Clytia woke up to a beeping sound, her mind a little foggy. She opened her eyes, only to meet a blurry light. She closed her eyes one more time and took a deep breath, trying to remember where she was. The last thing she remembered was that she was going to her room to have some sleep and it looked like the ground was getting closer and then nothing.

Fuck!

She opened her eyes, her vision clear now. She looked around. Hospital! She thought, groaning slightly.

“Clytia?”

It was a deep voice on her left. She turned her head to find an anxious Nolam.

“Hey!” He whispered, standing by her side, his hand caressing her arm gently.

“How are you feeling? You scared us you know!? Do you need anything? Are you in pain? Let me go and call the nurse.” He finished. But she grabbed his hand, stopping him.

“I’m good Nolam. Can you help me sit up please?”

“Sure.” He said, being careful.

She was watching his every moves like an eagle on the prowl. His clothes were wrinkled. She looked passed his shoulders, to see a chair. He must have slept there. Was he really worried about her?

“How long was I out? What time is it?” She asked once she was done drinking some water.

Nolam remained seated by her side. Clytia didn’t know how to behave with him around. Not long ago, he literally through her out of his place, now he wouldn’t leave her side.

Am I dying? Oh God! But... is it a bad thing if I am? Isn’t it what I want? No more suffering!

“Few hours. It is 9pm.” Nolam said breaking her thoughts.

“Wow! What’s wrong with me? I am not dying, am I?”

“No, of course no. Don’t be silly!”

“Nolam, you couldn’t stand my presence this morning, so why are you here now? What’s wrong with me?”

He stood up and put his hands in his pockets. How am I supposed to tell her?

“Nolam?” She insisted. “I want to talk to the doctor.”

“You will talk to the doctor tomorrow. You fainted because you were tired. You need to have some rest. That’s it. Don’t sweat it. There’s no reason for you to worry.”

Clytia frowned. He was hiding something from her. She could feel it. But she was too tired to argue with him.

“I know you’re hiding something from me Nolam. But, we will talk about it in the morning.”

“I am not hid…”

“Don’t lie.” She said, interrupting him before yawning. “We’ll talk in the morning.”

Nolam nodded, a tight smile on his lips.

Clytia woke the next morning feeling a little less under the weather. She opened her eyes to find that she was alone this time. Slowly, she got up dragging the IV with her in the bathroom. She couldn’t shower with that thing attached to her. But she tried her best to make herself presentable. Once she felt fresh, she walked back in the room to find Nolam.

“Good morning Cly.” He said as he walked towards her to help her, but she stopped him shaking her head.

When she was back on the bed, she looked at him. He was still in the same clothes, his eyes a little red. She could sense the tension on his shoulders as he had his hands in his pockets.

“You hungry? What do you want to eat?” He asked trying to appear normal.

“I am not hungry.”

“Clytia, you need to eat. You’ve lost so much weight. You can’t afford to lose anymore.”

She rolled her eyes at him. “Can you call the doctor please?”

“Clytia, I am serious.”

“So am I Nolam! The doctor! Or do I have to go get him myself?”

“The nurse was here early this morning. She said everything was okay. Are you in pain?” He asked, his brows frowned.

“I am not in pain. I want to know what happened to me.”

He racked his hands in his hair. “You have a concussion, from hitting your head on a table or something when you fainted. And the doctor said you passed out because you were exhausted, dehydrated, with low blood pressure. Probably the stress.”

“Is that all Nolam?” She asked looking for his eyes. But he wouldn’t look at her.

“Nolam?” She insisted as he remained silent. “What else Nolam?”

“You… you had a miscarriage.” He murmured, finally looking at her.

Clytia’s jaws dropped. “That is not possible. I am not… I was not pregnant. It must be a mistake.”

“I am sorry.”

“No!” She said, shaking her head.

“Clytia…”

“Shut up!” She gritted. She got off the bed.

“What are you doing Clytia?.” Nolam asked alarmed. “You need to…” He got interrupted by Clytia’s laugh.

Her whole body was bent forward, her arms around her stomach while she was laughing. Nolam looked at her, puzzled. He took a cautious step towards her. She looked like a lunatic, on the verge of sanity.

“Cly? You should calm down.”

“This is a joke, right?” She asked getting closer to him, grabbing his shirt and shaking him. “Not again. Tell me you’re lying. Not another baby. Please tell me that you’re just trying to hurt me. That you’re looking for revenge. It is a lie. Please tell me it is a lie.” She begged now, her hysterical laugh turned into cries of despair.

She was broken. Beyond understanding.

“It can’t be true. It can’t be true. It can’t be true.” She kept repeating over and over again while she crumbled on the floor, screaming in anguish, her face drenched in tears.

Nolam followed her on the ground, crying with her. At that moment, nothing mattered more than being there for Clytia. He wished he could take her pain away. But he couldn’t.

Although they had never discussed the first miscarriage after the issue with her father, he had heard her cry several times when she thought she was alone over the first baby. Things were different this time. She wasn't the strong woman she was then. She had carried them both, taking care of him and being there for him. However, at the moment, she looked like a shell of herself and he wasn't sure he was strong enough to carry them both.