𝙠𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙛𝙩𝙡𝙮 | the trickster × female reader

chapter sixteen ; admit it [🍉]

your pov:
i don't know if i can do this. i don't think i can. oh my god, i think i am gonna die before i could even speak. oh, wait, i can't die here. oh fuck.

your thoughts ran wild in your brain as you and the others walked back to the campfire, steve's hand holding onto your shaky hand. you looked at him and his look was rather relieved, but also slightly panicked. maybe because of what you are going to tell to the others later; that was expected anyways. you looked at yun-jin, who looked back at you as she rubbed your back, as if she knew what was going on in your mind. you sighed. "you'll be fine, y/n." she whispered as you nodded. "thank you." you thanked her back as she displayed a small smile. as soon as you, steve and the others got back to the campfire, the other survivors sighed of relief as they saw you; nea quickly went over to you to hug you tightly, but you stepped back, which made her surprised in your reaction. "is.. there something wrong with what happened earlier, y/n?" she asked you as you looked down, sitting down on the log that surrounded the campfire. "don't mind her nea, she's just... going to tell us something." meg said as she whispered into the graffiti artist's ear as nea nodded, knowing the situation as she sat beside you, rubbing her hand against your back as you kept your eyes glued to the ground.

"you're going to be just fine, y/n. if you can't speak up about it, we can do it for you! right girls?" laurie crouched in front of you as she looked to your other group of friends, who nodded and hummed in response. you ended up cracking a small smile. "thank you." you thanked them as they smiled at you, hugging you as they kept talking to you about stuff.

meanwhile, your mind trailed back to ji-woon. is he okay? you come to remember all the times with him together before that; remembering the first encounter with him was hectic, but rather a start to an adventure, and that adventure might as well end here. you sighed as you leaned forward from your seat. "alright y/n, i think it's time for you to explain what you and yun-jin got yourselves into." dwight spoke as the rest of the survivors sat down; some of them stood up, and some of them just listened from a distance. you faced to them as you felt nea rub your back again. "alright, alright, uhm.." you cleared your throat as you tried to form some words, laurie held your hand as kate fixed your hair, trying to calm yourself down so you could speak and tell the other survivors what you have been doing. you glanced at yun-jin, who smiled softly as you smiled back. looking at the rest of the survivors, you finally spoke.

"me and the trickster have been hooking up."

the others gasped; some gasped in horror, and some gasped in shock, you tried to calm down as kate held your hand tightly after feeling it become tense, you looked down in shame as steve's eyes widened. "are you stupid y/n?" he asked as you sighed. "yes, yes i am. but i promise, there isn't going to be any of that anymore." you said as he chuckled. "i hope it will be like that, cause that's just weird. you're weird." he said as he walked away. elodie came over to you as you sighed quietly once again, her handing you a drink. "drink up, i'm sure you're tired from running." she said as you slowly drank whatever she gave you. "don't mind steve, he's just been very upset and cranky lately." she said as she giggled as you slightly chuckled while handing back the cup to her, feeling your senses freshen themselves. "it's fine, he is right anyways." you giggled as yui sat beside you. "you really are curious, but i didn't know you could get to this level of curiosity." yui stated as you chuckled. "yeah, i'm so sorry about that. i really am." you apologized as she giggled. "whatever, i don't mind. i'm just glad you're okay." she patted your shoulder as she walked away with nea and zarina.

you looked at the rest, who embraced you tightly as you giggled to yourselves. you sighed happily; you felt happy in here, you felt really good in your friends' embrace. but... you wanted to feel the same with ji-woon. you wanted to feel the same feeling of embrace and being held in his arms, you wanted to feel like that again. but after the promise that you just made with the other survivors and steve himself, you felt like that couldn't even be possible anymore. but you still wanted to feel his laughter, his somehow wide eyes looking into yours, you just wanted things to be normal.